Only In America.....

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MegMeg112
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Postby MegMeg112 » Thu Jun 19, 2003 1:49 am

> 1 Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an
> ambulance.
>
> 2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a
> skating rink.
>
> 3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to
> the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people
> can buy cigarettes at the front.
>
> 4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large
> fries, and a diet coke.
>
> 5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open an! then chain
> the pens to the counters.
>
> 6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in
> the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
>
> 7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls
> and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we
> didn't want to talk to in the first place.
>
> 8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns
> in packages of eight.
>
> 9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
> process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
> 'bloodsucking creatures'.
>
> 10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with
> Braille lettering.
>
> EVER WONDER
>
> Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
>
> Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
>
> Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
>
> Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
>
> Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
>
> Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?
>
> Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid
> made with real lemons?
>
> Why is the man w! ho inves ts all your money called a broker?
>
> Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
>
> Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
>
> When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
>
> Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
>
> Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
>
> You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
> don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
>
> Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
>
> Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
>
> If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
>
> If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

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Isied
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Postby Isied » Thu Jun 19, 2003 7:00 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:

thanx.

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laura l
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Postby laura l » Sat Jun 21, 2003 9:26 am

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

ROLF!! :lol: :lol: :lol: Thanks!

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

The answer is in the question :lol: ;)

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nommie22
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Postby nommie22 » Sat Jun 21, 2003 5:27 pm

The American observations are funny if not simple generalisation. Same can be done for all countries. But I guess it's healthy to poke fun at oneself every now and again. Keeps us all sane!

As for the questions: comedy genius! thanks Isied!

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Isied
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Postby Isied » Sun Jun 22, 2003 1:28 pm

thanx me??

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heloise
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Postby heloise » Wed Jul 02, 2003 7:59 am

LOL !!!

No more comment !

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Isied
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Postby Isied » Wed Jul 02, 2003 6:21 pm

I think she meant to thank meg.

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heloise
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Postby heloise » Wed Jul 02, 2003 7:02 pm

yes, it's that ! :D thaks a lot ! my friend will be very glad :lol:

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Isied
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Postby Isied » Wed Jul 02, 2003 7:42 pm

u r welcome. :P


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