Outside

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mzjrt1252
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Postby mzjrt1252 » Thu Mar 04, 2004 10:12 pm

<span style='color:red'>I'm going threw a rough time right now and out of all the depressiveness (I know its not a word ) I feel inside I began writing....and this came out. Its really dark and sad. Its talking about abuse and a lot of problems but I promise that it'll end up happy. So here's the first chapter...</span>

<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>Outside</span>


:: Outside by Staind ::

And you, bring me to my knee, again
And all the times, that I had to beg you please in vain
And all the times, that I’ve felt insecure for you
And I leave my burdens at the door


<span style='font-family:Arial'>It was a peaceful day, I had just gotten home from a friends house. I came home early because my father had mentioned that he would have over some very important people and that he needed the whole family to be there. As I pulled into the drive way of the very large home that my father brought, I noticed a black Escalade that I had never seen before parked next to my father’s Mercedes. I parked behind my father’s car and got out of my car , and headed towards the house.

As I opened the door to my house I heard laughing coming from the kitchen area. It was my father’s favorite spot of the house to entertain at. I walked over to the kitchen and looked around at the people that were scattered around. My step-mother Monica was chatting with a nice looking middle-aged woman with curly blonde hair and bright blue eyes, then there was two young men leaning against the wall chatting while sipping on some beer, of course I recognized one of them because it was the super famous ex-boy band member and current soul man Justin Timberlake. Then I turned to the kitchen where I saw a dark skinned man in his forties talking with my father. I think I actually cringed when I looked into my father’s left hand and saw a beer in it.

You see, my father has a drinking problem but not if you ask him. He thinks he’s allowed to drink excessively because he’s under a lot of pressure and because of the death of my mother two years earlier. With my father there is no such thing as one or two beers, no it was more like a six pack or more with him. In the time span of two hours he could drink a whole six pack himself, and this is a daily occurrence. Not only that but my father is an aggressive drunk, and who did he lash out at? Me of course. If it wasn’t hateful insulting words it was actual physical abuse. All this started two years ago when my mother died, he started drinking and acting out. Making scenes in public places, insulting my friends in their faces, throwing various items around the room and even kicking me out on the street a couple of times. So you have to understand the fear I felt when I saw that beer in his hand, I knew that he hadn’t just had one he had probably had many more before I got home. I didn’t want my father to pull one of his stunts in front of Justin nor his guest and I didn’t want to see my father’s business deal go down the crapper because of some drunken scene.

After taking a deep breath I made my presence known by stepping into the room completely. My father waved me over to the kitchen to introduce me to everyone.

“Come here Victoria, Johnny this is my oldest daughter Victoria.â€￾

I shook Johnny’s hand and then turned to everyone else who had gathered around to meet me. My eyes landed on Justin, I wasn’t the biggest fan of Nsync nor of Justin’s solo project but I did own Justified and all the other Nsync albums. Even though I wasn’t obsessed I did have eyes and Justin was one of the hottest men in the world and he was looking mighty fine today.

“Victoria this is Justin, his mother Lynn and his personal assistant Juan.â€￾

My father pointed to everyone as he went along, introducing me to everyone.

“Nice to meet you.â€￾ Justin said as he extended his hand to greet me

“Nice to meet you too.â€￾ I smiled

“Well where was I?â€￾ My father said as he took Johnny aside and continued talking with him.

I looked down at my clothes and noticed I was still wearing what I wore to school earlier that day, a pair of hip hugger jeans and a tight black one shoulder tank top. I can’t believe that Justin Timberlake is seeing me like this! I need to go change.

“Oh my, I forgot to change! I’m still in my school clothes.â€￾ I said to no one in particular

“You look fine, don’t even worry about it.â€￾ Justin said

“Thanks but I’ll be right back.â€￾ Before I could leave the kitchen Justin grabbed my arm

“Please don’t leave us here, my mother and yours are talking and me and Trace are stuck here all bored. You look fine, now why don’t you make us some company?â€￾ Justin pleaded in a hushed tone since his mother was a few feet away.

“Umm…sure I guess I don’t really need to change. So what do you guys wanna do?â€￾

“Anything.â€￾

“How about some television?â€￾

“Sure.â€￾

Justin, Trace and I went into the living room and began watching tv. A while later I heard my father calling me into the kitchen. The moment I heard his voice a panic rushed threw me, I knew what was gonna happen next.

I walked into the kitchen to find my father staggering a bit, he was still talking to Johnny who looked a little unsure what to do in this situation. I looked over at my step-mother who hid her face in shame as Lynn looked at the scene in front of her in shock.

“Hey…you!! Where the f*** have you been, huh??â€￾ he yelled pointing his finger at me

“I’ve been in the living room.â€￾

“Do you think I’m stupid?â€￾

“No, where wou-â€￾

“DO YOU THINK I’M STUPID, YOU f***ING WHORE!!!â€￾

Everyone in the room was silent and I saw out the corner of my eye that Justin and Trace had come to see what the problem was.

“ANSWER ME!!â€￾

“What do you want me to say?â€￾

“YOU KNOW WHAT? IT’S ALL YOUR f***ING FAULT YOU f***ING BRAT!!! YOU RUINED MY LIFE, ALL YOU DO IS BRING PROBLEMS!!!â€￾

“What are you talking about??â€￾

“DON’T YOU EVER QUESTION ME YOU IGNORANT SLUT!!â€￾

He started to come towards me, still yelling random things at me. Then it came like a thunder bolt. His left hand connected with my right lower cheek and part of my lip. Everything was silent, my head still bowed to the side not moving. I couldn’t move, the stinging too intense. Then the screaming started as he rose his hand once more to strike me again but this time he couldn’t connect like he wished. Johnny grabbed his out stretched hand and pushed him against the wall, Justin and Trace rushed pass me as they helped Johnny keep him against the wall as he was now struggling to get his hands on me again. He was yelling insults at me, Johnny, Justin, Trace and everyone else in his view. Then I felt a soft delicate hand reach out and grab my arm pulling me out of the kitchen and over by the stairs that lead upstairs. The arm guided me upstairs and softly asked where my bedroom was, I quickly responded and I was lead into my bedroom. The door closed and locked, it was then that I looked up. Lynn’s kind eyes met my empty ones and then a gasp escaped her lips as she saw my face.

“Dear child! Oh lord, I’m so sorry sweetie.â€￾

I looked pass her into my full length mirror, I wanted to throw up. He had busted my lip and there was blood trickling down my mouth and chin and a bruise was starting to form on my cheek.

“Does he do this a lot honey?â€￾

I just nodded in response, I couldn’t say anything. I was too ashamed.

“You know what? This isn’t right, I’m getting you out of here. Come on child pack your bags, quickly before the boys can’t hold your father any longer.â€￾

I silently got up off the bed and opened my closet. I pulled out a large black suitcase and opened it on the bed, I began to reach for my clothes but Lynn spoke up.

“Don’t worry about clothes, we’ll buy you new clothes just bring things that are special to you.â€￾

I grabbed a couple of items of clothing that I loved, all my pictures, a shoe box with all my special memories and other things like that. Once I was finished I closed the suit case grabbed my book bag with all my school things in it and followed Lynn out of my bedroom. We went downstairs to find that Johnny was still holding my father back. Justin grabbed the suitcase and Trace grabbed my arm and lead me towards their car. I opened my car quickly and took all my cds and other personal things I had in there and got into Justin’s car. Lynn sat with me in the back as did Justin, Trace sat up front with Johnny driving. Lynn hugged me and told me it was ok to cry as Justin just rubbed my back.</span>

But I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
‘cause inside your ugly
Your ugly like me
I can see through you
See through the real you


<span style='color:blue'>Alright....love it? hate it? Either way let me know! I need feedback before I post another chapter. Thanks! </span>

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Angelpopstar7
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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sat Mar 06, 2004 11:17 pm

I'm sorry that your going through a tough time right now :hug: If you ever need to talk you can pm me ok??

but your story OMG I LOVE IT!!! It's soo good but I feel so bad for her! My uncle is an alcoholic and just recently got out of rehab so I know how that is...luckyily he has never hit my aunt or my cousins, at least not that I'm aware of that is...but I'm soo happy that Lynn, Justin, Trace and Johnny are getting her out of there...thats the best thing possible for her...I hope that her doesn't try to find her though...ahhh MORE PLEASE!

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Postby mtvjunkie » Sun Mar 07, 2004 6:16 am

MORE!!! i really like this story, update soon.

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Angelpopstar7
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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sat Mar 13, 2004 7:59 pm

bump

I hope that things are lookin up for ya :hug:

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betty boop
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Postby betty boop » Sat Mar 20, 2004 1:21 am

That was really good. I'm kinda sad though cuz I don't know when I'm gonna get to read your updates. I'll try though. ;)

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tendertoes
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Postby tendertoes » Sat Mar 20, 2004 10:28 am

<span style='color:purple'>I'm sorry that your going through such a difficult time right now!!
Writing is a wonderful realease though!
THat was very sad but also very good!! I'm ready for another chapter!!
</span>

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whatchagot4meMRJT
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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Sat Mar 20, 2004 12:54 pm

I swear I thought I left feedback for this story. It's great, I hope that you will continue with it when things are better for you. I feel so sad for Victoria. I'm glad she's out of that house. Her dad is dangerous.

Release your hurt through your writing. I know that you can make it through. We're all here for you. :)

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megzrsa
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Postby megzrsa » Sat Mar 20, 2004 7:35 pm

This story is really touching, its so sad that she had to put up with the abuse from her dad. Her dad definately needs help. Im glad that lynne and everybody were there to help her :)
How are you doing mzjrt1252? (soz i dunno ur name)

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mzjrt1252
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Postby mzjrt1252 » Wed Mar 24, 2004 8:56 pm

<span style='font-family:Arial'><span style='color:red'>Hello! Sorry that I haven't been able to update since...umm forever but I've been really busy with school and stuff. I currently writing part two so look out for it soon!

I would just like to say THANK YOU to all of you who showed concern for me! Thanks a lot for caring, aww I feel so loved :wub: I'm doing much better right now, but my life is a bit of a roller coaster :lol: but just like J.Lo says "I'm gonna be alright!" Thanks for so much feedback too!

Oh and my name is Yesenia :wave:</span></span>

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whatchagot4meMRJT
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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Thu Mar 25, 2004 10:23 am

Yesenia, I'm glad that you're working on part two of this story and I know that you're going to be alright. The most important part of getting through anything is having faith and keeping a positive mind. You're already doing that, so you're on your way!

By the way, you have a beautiful name. Very exotic! :D

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Postby mtvjunkie » Thu Mar 25, 2004 12:46 pm

By the way, you have a beautiful name. Very exotic!
i was just thinking that...
anyways, if you ever need support you know where to come, and we will all wait (and try to be patient) for the next update. :rolleyes:

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megzrsa
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Postby megzrsa » Thu Mar 25, 2004 1:52 pm

Yesenia is a really nice name and very unusual :P
Glad ur doing ok, and u noe we are all here for you if you need to talk :D
cant wait for the next chapter

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Angelpopstar7
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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Mon Apr 12, 2004 9:53 pm

BUMP!

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Beach_Babe05
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Postby Beach_Babe05 » Tue Apr 20, 2004 1:44 pm

i love it! it's really good keep on writing darling!!


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