Can't Let You Go

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Sat Jul 10, 2004 10:37 am

<span style='color:hotpink'>Just as a little recap, this is Mirano and one.

And this is what JT is lookin' like now. :D

And no, Paige, Tony Mirano is totally fictitious. :lol: :kiss: But he does play Luis Lopez-Fitzgerald on Passions. B)</span>

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Sat Jul 10, 2004 10:52 am

Eureka! I knew I had seen him from somewhere. Dude, he's smokin'. Might have to start watching Passions just for him. :lick: :drool:

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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sat Jul 10, 2004 5:00 pm

I'm happy for Michelle but she belongs with J....Ash you need to get these 2 out on a date, have Michelle realize that he's not the man for her and get back with Justin :nod: Although Tony is a hottie he's not Justin :no: AHHH I NEED MORE!! MORE PLEASE!

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Postby justins bubbles » Sun Jul 11, 2004 1:22 am

<span style='color:blue'>Damn, she better at least get to f^ck Tony before she gets back with Justin. :huh: </span>

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Sun Jul 11, 2004 10:17 am

^^ My thoughts exactly. :safesex: Ladies, it's always nice to use men for sex every now and again. They don't mind. :no: :lol:

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Postby megzrsa » Sun Jul 11, 2004 3:34 pm

Im all caught up :( Tony is hot!!!!!! :o But yeah like Heather said Michelle sud use him and hopefully she will come to her senses. Her and Justin are meant to be :nod: More please :P

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Fri Jul 16, 2004 1:18 pm

<span style='color:limegreen'>Alrighty, so here we go. I don't really know the point of this chapter, but it's written, so read it, dammit. :lol: Just kidding. It sucks, but I promised more, so never say I didn't do anything for y'all. :P :crossfingers:

<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:dodgerblue'>Chapter 25
The Broken Smile

I retreated from my bathroom to hear the buzz of someone at the security gate just outside my driveway. I hadn’t been expecting anyone, but being 11PM on a Tuesday, I figured that it was probably important. Either that, or some fans just don’t know when to quit. Nonetheless, I went to the surveillance system to find Heather’s white Acura in plain view. Confused, I allowed her through the gates and unlocked my front door, awaiting her arrival.

Within a few minutes, the sound of entry resonated throughout the kitchen and I smiled to greet her while her frown met me. Perplexed, I studied her features. Her light blue eyes were puffy and red, her blonde hair was messily piled atop her head, and her clothing screamed neglect. I’ve never seen her so discombobulated.

She looked at me with tired eyes that seemed to be pleading for mercy. “Hey,â€￾ she said softly.

I responded with a sympathetic glance. “Are you all right?â€￾

She stood back in her right leg and wiped imaginary tears from her eyes. She seemed more angry than sad, in my opinion. “We’re getting a divorce,â€￾ she finally announced.

My jaw dropped and went straight for her to comfort her seemingly fatigued body. “I’m so sorry.â€￾

A couple of real tears found her face and dripped to my bare arms as we embraced. “Don’t be,â€￾ she stated. “It just wasn’t meant to be, or something.â€￾

“Maybe not, but it still hurts.â€￾ Hell, I’m still hurt over Michelle, so I know she’s gotta be torn up about her husband of 8 years. Or at least, she should be.

“It’s been a long time coming. We were just afraid to let go, I guess.â€￾

I know the feeling. “So what’s gonna happen with Megan?â€￾ The kids always get lost in the shuffle of these divorces.

“We don’t know yet. We just decided this like 20 minutes ago,â€￾ she responded with a slight chuckle. “It’s gonna take a while to figure out where to go and what to do.â€￾

“Well you know I’m here when and if you need me.â€￾

She nodded and let go of me, walking further into the kitchen. “You got any good wine in this place?â€￾

Yeah, because I drink wine all the time. “Girl, I got some whiskey and some Cap’n Mo.â€￾

With a loud scoff, she pulled glasses out of the cupboard. “Got some Coke?â€￾

After I finished locating the Jack Daniels, I retrieved what was left of a 3 Liter Coke and followed her to the terrace just outside the living room, overlooking one of the many canyons that Los Angeles is famous for.

She handed me a glass before getting to work on our drinks. “So how are you,â€￾ she inquired.

I nodded in hopes of lifting her spirits with optimism. “I’m pretty good. Hangin’ in there.â€￾

“Not ready to go public yet?â€￾

I sighed and leaned back in the large black recliner. “I don’t think so.â€￾

“Well, whenever you’re ready.â€￾

I don’t think I’ll ever be. “I think I just wanna wait it out and see what happens. We could get back together, or something.â€￾

“You think?â€￾

God, I hope so. I shrugged and took a sip of Heather’s concoction. “Anything is possible.â€￾

“How true,â€￾ she sniffled.

“Are you su—“

“Oh, hey, Oprah called this afternoon,â€￾ she accidentally interrupted. “You up for it?â€￾

“Do I have a choice?â€￾

“Well, you always have a choice,â€￾ she chuckled. “But it’s for the whole ‘Edison’ cast, so you’d probably wanna be there.â€￾

Man, this movie promotion is gonna kick my ass. “Then, sure, I guess.â€￾

“I mean, you’ll only have a few minutes with her one-on-one before another member of the cast comes out.â€￾

“Oh, well then cool.â€￾

“Only if you want to,â€￾ she added.

“Do I have to talk about Michelle?â€￾

“Dude, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.â€￾

“See that’s what I love about you,â€￾ I suddenly realized. “You’re like, ‘Whatever, man.’ Michelle woulda been like, ‘You have to say this, that, this, smile, sit up, laugh, don’t chew gum, don’t say “um,â€￾ and blah, blah, blah.’â€￾

With a laugh, she stared at me intently. “I dunno, I’m not totally familiar with the whole ‘publicist’ deal, but you’re a grown man. Why should I tell you what to do?â€￾

“I like your thinking.â€￾

“I aim to please,â€￾ she smiled. “I’m just here to advise you.â€￾

“Well hey, I don’t pay you enough to be my mama.â€￾

“True dat,â€￾ she snorted just before we combusted into hysteric laughter.

I could get used to this.

“So do you think you’ll ever get over her?â€￾

“I dunno,â€￾ I replied somberly, looking at the floor. “I could.â€￾

Our conversation took a depressing turn for the worst when Heather’s husband called to inform her that he and Megan were leaving for his parents’ house up in Calabasas and that he’d call her by the weekend. Somehow, that led back to Michelle and me.

“You could?â€￾ she asked.

“I could…â€￾

“But you don’t know how.â€￾

“I saw her yesterday, actually. She was running down the hall at the office, and crashed right into me.â€￾

“Wow. Was that awkward?â€￾

“Nah,â€￾ I laughed slightly. “She just apologized and kept on going.â€￾


“I know right.â€￾

“Yeah, so…â€￾ I trailed off, “Who knows.â€￾

“What were you doing at the office,â€￾ she randomly asked.

“I dunno. I might have been coming to see you, or something.â€￾

“You’re a liar.â€￾

“Well. I could’ve been.â€￾

“I was in my office all day.â€￾



I rolled my eyes to avoid her stare. “You want somethin’ else to eat?â€￾

She watched me rise from my chair quickly and wait for her answer. “I’ll have whatever you have,â€￾ she sang.

Departing from the balcony with a laugh, I made my way back to the kitchen to fix a couple of sandwiches, despite the fact that it was nearing 1AM. I just had to get away from her gaze. She has those piercing blue eyes and an intimidating stare that could literally make me sweat if I sat there long enough.

Finally advancing back to where Heather sat, gaping at the scenery, I handed her a plate and glass and sat back down. She looked down, and then back up at me. “Peanut butter and jelly?â€￾

“You said you wanted whatever I was having.â€￾

“That was before I realized that you and Meg had the same eating habits.â€￾

I crossed my arms and waited for her to eat. “Just try it. You need some more milk?â€￾

“No,â€￾ she said, with an indifferent wave of her hand. “It’s fine, thank you.â€￾

I devoured my PBJ while she picked off the crust and nibbled at the bread. “So when’s Oprah?â€￾

“Not until May.â€￾

“And the premiere?â€￾

“A little later in May?â€￾ she laughed. She pulled out her cell phone and started pressing buttons. “Okay, Oprah is tentatively scheduled for May 8th, the ‘Edison’ premiere is May 10th, and it opens the 12th.

“Okay, hectic week,â€￾ I acknowledged.

“Oh, right, and Michelle has invited you to JC’s album release party.â€￾

“When’s that?â€￾

“For now, they have it planned for the 22nd with a release date on the 23rd.â€￾

“Of May?â€￾ I asked.

She nodded. “Both of y’all are gonna be insanely busy that month.â€￾

“Tell me about it.â€￾

“But hey, you’ve got all of March and April to prepare for it, so…â€￾


There was a lull between us before either one of us even attempted at saying anything else, where we just stared at each other awkwardly.

“Well, I guess since David and Meg are gone, I can get on home and stop bugging you,â€￾ Heather suddenly proclaimed.

“Hey, you’re more than welcome to stay here if you want.â€￾

“Don’t be silly. I have a perfectly fine house that I can go to, or you know, my mom’s or a friend. I don’t need to be imposing on you.â€￾

I looked at her expectantly, scratching at a nonexistent itch on my cheek. “I am your friend, you know.â€￾

“No, I know. I just – I shouldn’t be bringing you down with my sh** when you’ve got your own baggage to carry.â€￾

“Fair enough,â€￾ I replied as she rose from her chair. I stood up with her and followed her into the house, watching her nearly stumble through the sliding door. “Actually, I don’t think that you need to be going anywhere in your condition.â€￾

“What condition?â€￾

“Girl, you’re drunk.â€￾

She turned to stare at me incredulously. “Not even close.â€￾

“Even so,â€￾ I sighed, “I’d feel better if you stayed here.â€￾

“Why? You gonna try and seduce me?â€￾ she laughed.

“I’m sure you’d love that, but no, I’m just gonna make sure you’re safe.â€￾

She dropped her head to stare at the floor and chuckled lightly. “You’re cute,â€￾ she finished, returning her gaze to mine.

I lifted my brow in slight bewilderment and smiled. “So are you. Let’s go upstairs.â€￾

Before I could even motion to turn, Heather grabbed my T-shirt by its collar, and thrust her lips over mine. I wasn’t sure if it was the liquor or her high-strung emotion that were dictating her actions, but I knew that they weren’t of pure attraction, so I thought it best to stop her before anything happened that we’d regret.

“Whoa,â€￾ I said, trying to pull away from her kiss. “Okay, let’s slow down a second.â€￾

“Justin, I didn’t have that much to drink,â€￾ she mumbled into my lips. She must have read my mind. “Just let me do this.â€￾

“Heather, you don’t really want this.â€￾

“I do.â€￾

“Come on,â€￾ I maintained, finally succeeding at breaking our contact, “You don’t really wanna go there.â€￾

“Justin, she’s gone. Let’s move on together.â€￾

“Heather, I like you a lot. I think you’re great and all that, but you’re my friend.â€￾


“Albeit, my beautiful friend, this just isn’t right. You’re just upset, and possibly… drunk,â€￾ I laughed, “And I’m still trying to get over losing Michelle.â€￾

“Dude, I’m the best way for you to do that.â€￾

This is more embarrassing than I’d like to even fathom. “Let’s just go upstairs, find you some pajamas, and get you to bed.â€￾

“Preferably your bed...â€￾

I looked at her with lack of amusement. “This could be really awkward in the morning if you don’t stop.â€￾

“Okay, okay,â€￾ she relented. “Let’s just go to bed and act like this never happened.â€￾

“Gladly,â€￾ I muttered under my breath. I followed behind her as she slowly walked through the kitchen, up the steps and to the bedroom adjacent to mine.

“Justin,â€￾ she called out once I’d walked past her and reached my room.

I reentered the hall, moving back to the guest room and stood in the doorway. “Yes?â€￾

“Thank you for not letting me go further.â€￾

“Don’t mention it,â€￾ I smiled.

I began to walk off before she stopped me again. “Hey.â€￾


“It’s not always rainbows and butterflies.â€￾

“It’s compromise that moves us along,â€￾ I smiled, finishing the lyric she had started.

“Just remember that.â€￾

I nodded, closing my eyes and thinking of the rest of the words to the song. “Yeah, you too.â€￾</span></span></span>

:huh: Yeah, I don't get it either. :lol: But I like the feedback, so leave it anyway. And then go check out the Fanfic challenge because I said so. :nerd: :P :D</span>

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Postby mtvjunkie » Sat Jul 17, 2004 10:45 am

thats not whats supposed to happen :unsure: infact justin and michelle werent supposed to break up in the first place. fix it miss ashley or im sending paige a whip in the post to teach you a lesson :nono:

:yell: UPDATE!!!

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Sun Jul 18, 2004 10:24 am



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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sun Jul 18, 2004 10:39 am

So Heather and her husband are gettin a divorce hunh?? Interesting....of course we all know why she went to Justin's house :rolleyes: But I'm glad that Justin didn't let it go any further....good boy :nod: ahh MORE PLEASE!

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Postby Sarah » Sun Jul 18, 2004 12:25 pm

<span style='color:deeppink'>I knew something like this would happen! i'm glad that Justin stopped it before it could go any further.
I still think that he and Michelle should get back together and the sooner the better!
great chapter hun! update soon </span>

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Postby justins bubbles » Sun Jul 18, 2004 5:58 pm

<span style='color:blue'>Yay for him. ^_^ Why is fan fic Justin so much better than real Justin?

I think it's about time I update huh? ;) </span>

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Postby mtvjunkie » Sun Jul 18, 2004 6:14 pm

why do believe bubs idea is a stroke of genius. maybe you should find inspiration from it ash :nod:

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Sun Jul 18, 2004 6:28 pm

Update Bubs. Update! NOW! :nod:

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Thu Jul 22, 2004 10:00 pm

<span style='color:limegreen'>Hey party people. I know it's getting stagnant, but there's good stuff coming. I promise. Anywho, here's more in the meantime. :D
<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:blueviolet'>
Chapter 26
Pieces of Me

With a headset perched atop my newly shorn brown hair, I putter around my apartment on the phone with JC. Our conversation is fluctuating between personal and professional business.

"So are you ready for your date tonight?" he asks, emphasizing the word 'date.'

"No," I reply quickly with a chuckle. "I don't know what to wear, what do to with my hair, where we're going. I'm a mess."

"Well first of all, calm the hell down," he laughs. "Tony isn't gonna bite."

"I know. But it's like, dude, I haven't been out with a new person in more than two years. It's like reentering the work force or some sh**."

"Oh, Lord, you sound something like Justin's dating theory."

"I do, don't I?" Well sh**, he's right. "Dating is like a job interview that's just going terribly wrong."

"It can be," he agrees, "But it can be like finding out that there's an opening for that job that you wanted so bad, and you knew your interview just went perfectly, then getting the position."

I ponder his statement momentarily while studying the shoes stacked up in my walk-in closet. "Okay, I think that's enough metaphorical discussion for today."

"Yeah I'm gonna confuse myself in a minute."

"So you think I'll be all right?" I ask, getting back to the subject at hand.

"Yup." He sighs into the receiver before switching gears. "Oh yeah, so Syd told me about you switchin' up your hairstyle on us. What is it now?"

That girl and her mouth. "I chopped most of it off," I shrug.

"How come?"

"I dunno, I just got tired of it. I'm going through a lot of changes, so it seemed appropriate."

"You like it?"

"I guess. People have been saying that it looks like Rachel's that year she cut hers off. Was that the season she got pregnant?"

"Rachel?" he inquires, perplexed.

"Jennifer Anniston? Friends?"

"Oh, right. The epitome of pop culture."

"Don't act like you didn't watch it."

"I watched like three seasons and then the series finale."

"Dork," I reply, glancing at the clock. "Dude, it's like 7:00, so I'm gonna have to run."

"All right, mama. Y'all have fun and all that stuff I'm supposed to say."

"I'll try."

"You will," he maintains.

"Later." With that, I remove the headset and go through my closet for the third time in high hopes that something suitable catches my eye.

Tony didn't exactly tell me what to wear, but said not to go too fancy, so I'm deciding to stick with my love of pinstripes and throw on a light pink blazer over my favorite white and pink shirt and some comfortable jeans. I figure the pink Jimmy Choo Jams will dress it up enough for anywhere in town. As for my hair, I'll let the haircut speak for itself and hope that it's good enough for the million-dollar man.

I have no idea why I'm so nervous about trying to impress him. He's just another man. But God, he's so beautiful - that's all I can say about him. And I don't even think it's about wanting to make this a long-term thing, or even take it further than tonight. Maybe I'm just trying to convince myself that I can function totally normally without Justin in my life. I have to finally rest my head on something other than him.

Even if it's not real.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"So may I ask where we're going?" I'm perched in the passenger seat of Tony's silver Maserati Spyder convertible, cruising down US-101 in the warmth of this March evening.

He smiles back at me, perfecting the sexy lean he has going on with the steering wheel. "We'll be there soon, and you won't have to ask anything."

"But I've already asked," I shoot back with a grin.

"And you've gotten your answer." He coolly slips a non-labeled disc into his CD player. "JC has some new material that he wants you to hear."

"Are we on our way to a studio?"

With a chuckle, he instructs the volume on the stereo to increase, answering my second question. A delicate guitar riff introduces me to the song with subtle violins in the background. It sounds like a mellower version of Take It From Here, which compels me to close my eyes and let his words infiltrate my subconscious.

If you wanna fly then go ahead and fly
I won't make you; I won't ask why
I don't wanna see you cry no more
We've got the moment; what we're living for
It's right, it's wrong, it's dead, it's gone
You won't know until you try

"Did y'all work on this together?" I ask, once I assume the bridge is complete.

"Yes. But I was hoping you could perhaps enlighten me on who it was written about?" He looks at me expectantly, as if I'm supposed to know.

I shrug, feeling a bit childlike as I do. "I have no idea." Thankfully, Tony pulls up to the Kodak Theater before anymore cumbersome conversation can ensue. Is there some award show that I wasn't informed of?

Before the valet has the chance, Tony is at my side of the car, opening the door for me. "You know," he starts, "I had to do a little research for this, so I hope that you enjoy it?"

Research, huh? "I think I like the sound of that." He smiles back at me and behind the masses of other people, we slowly, but surely make our way into the confines of the theater.

Advancing to our reserved seats at the front, I begin beaming when I see who's standing on the stage. "Toni Morrison? Are you serious?" She's my most favorite author… ever.

"I thought you'd like it."

"This book reading has been sold out for months! How'd you do this?"

"A magician never reveals his secret, does he?"

"This is true." I sit back in my seat and focus my attention on the stage. I can't believe that I'm sitting 10 feet from one of my idols.

Naturally, all of them have a sad story: too much notice, not enough, or the worst kind. Some tale about dragon daddies and false-hearted men, or mean mamas and friends who did them wrong. Each story has a monster in it who made them tough instead of brave, so they open their legs rather than their hearts where that folded child is still tucked. … I know it's trash: just another story made up to scare wicked females and correct unruly children. But it's all I have. I know I need something else. Something better. Like a story that shows how brazen women can take a good man down. I can hum to that.

As she reads excerpts from her latest book, Love, I almost cry, remembering every feeling that was elicited when I read her words for the first time. It was when I first met Justin that I read this particular novel, and God, I remember it all so well.

"'Come on back, baby. Now I understand. Come back, baby. Take me by the hand.'" I recite the last words with her. "Either she doesn't know about me or has forgiven me for my solution, because she doesn't mind at all if I sit a little ways off, listening. But once in a while her voice is so full of longing for him, I can't help it. I want something back. Something just for me. So I join in. And hum."

The audience claps, rising from their seats, and my mind wanders. I wonder when I'll find that song that I can hum to; that beat that I'll be able to march to. Will I ever find a rhythm without Justin?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

After meeting Toni, or perhaps I should say Ms. Morrison, Tony and I headed for The Strip, stopping for dinner at Miyagi's. Seated on the second tier of patio seating, we nibble at sushi and finally talk to one another without a tape recorder situated between us.

"All right," I initiate, "You have to tell me how you knew who my favorite author was."

"Did I impress you?"


"Then that's all that matters, right?" His green eyes bore into my own as the two of us smile, and he coerces a forkful of white rice to my lips. "Rice?"

I remove the food from the fork and stare back at him. "That's not all that matters. I wanna know!"

"I have my sources."

"Are you stalkin' me, Mirano?"

He chuckles, taking a bite of his fish. "If I were, would you blame me?"

"No, I wouldn't blame you at all. I'd just get myself a nice little restraining order."

"Well restraint isn't exactly my forte." He winks and turns to look for our waitress to request the check. “So just let it go?â€￾

I roll my eyes and take a sip of my drink. “If there’s one thing you’re gonna have to learn about me, it’s that I don’t let anything go.â€￾

“I noticed. Which makes me wonder if I’m wasting my time here.â€￾

“Why would you think that?â€￾

“Well because you said that you were getting over a long-term relationship, so am I going to be battling your demons with the past, or what?â€￾

Well ain’t that a b****. First date and he’s going in for the kill. “You scared of a fight?â€￾

“Not at all,â€￾ he chuckles. “I’d just like to know what I should be preparing myself for.â€￾

“If I’m worth it, it won’t matter.â€￾


“But just because you asked, I’ll tell you that my past is definitely in the past,â€￾ I finish. I study his reaction while pushing food back and forth across my rectangular plate. The contrast of the white rice against the black dish ironically exemplifies my words and how they conflict with my actual feelings.

“So he’s in the past, too?â€￾

Damn, he just doesn’t quit. “Yes, whoever you think that ‘he’ may be, is in the past.â€￾ Somehow, he’s one of the few people in the world that don’t know about me and Justin, and I’d kind of like to keep it that way.

He stares at me while absentmindedly signing his credit card receipt. “I think you’re lying.â€￾

“I think you’re wrong.â€￾

“You still love him, no?â€￾

I smile at the fact that he can see that through basically nothing. “I still love the guy I was with before him, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not ready to move on.â€￾

“Well then let me correct myself. You’re still in love with him.â€￾

I scoff and let out a slight sigh before I shift my gaze to the throng of patrons entering this particular floor of the restaurant. “I think we should go.â€￾

Turning to take notice of my discovery, he agrees. “How convenient.â€￾

“So where are we headed now?â€￾ I ask, rising from the table. I hope that he’s either forgotten our conversation, or sees that I’d like it to be left alone.

“It’s up to you.â€￾

“My place or yours?â€￾

“I think I have something at my house that I’d like to show you.â€￾

Yeah, I just bet.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Okay, so I underestimated him. He wanted to show me the studio in the basement of his Beverly Hills mansion. Dude, this house is freakin’ gorgeous. Ten rooms, five bathrooms, and what seems like endless square feet of class. I’m not sure how effective it is, but every single room in his house is white, wholly white, nothing but white, and to my surprise, I love it. Oh, there’s a few splashes of black here and there, but whatever. At the risk of sounding like Paris Hilton, it’s hot.

“So when you run out of room down here, where are you gonna put all your awards?â€￾ I’m admiring the plaques that adorn his studio walls while he fidgets with buttons and knobs on his control panel thing.

“I don’t know. Maybe build a room or something.â€￾

Of course. I give him a definitive “coolâ€￾ before joining him in the engineering booth. “May I ask what you’re doing?â€￾

“I want you,â€￾ he says, pressing buttons on a remote control, “To sing for me.â€￾

A door suddenly swings open and I gape at him. “Uhh, why?â€￾

“I just want to see what you have to say.â€￾

“So you’re not only gonna make me sing, but I have to make something up?â€￾

He laughs at me. He laughs at me a lot, and I’m starting to wonder why. I’m not that funny. I suppose my ignorance is amusing. “Just sing whatever comes to mind.â€￾

“I can do that.â€￾ Walking into the side of the room with the padded walls and microphone, I eye him, wondering just what he’s getting at. Regardless, I put on the headphones and wait for his signal. “I’m warning you. I suck.â€￾

There he goes laughing again. “It’s okay. Just do what you feel.â€￾

Well I don’t feel much of anything. Damn it. I momentarily contemplate a few of my favorite songs before I settle on one of my favorites from a couple of years ago. “You think you know me. Word on the street is that you do. You want my history. What others tell you won’t be true. I walked a thousand miles while everyone was asleep. Nobody’s really seen my million subtleties.â€￾ I choose to sing Ashlee Simpson because I figure that there’s no way I can sound worse than she does.

“Okay, you can stop now,â€￾ Tony interjects with a chortle.

Turns out I’m wrong. “Was I that bad?â€￾

“Yeah,â€￾ he replies, joining me in the booth. “You’re cute, though.â€￾

I nod. “So are you.â€￾

“It was a good song.â€￾

“I know I suck, man. You don’t always have to be so diplomatic.â€￾

“You don’t always have to—“

I don’t know what drives me to do it – perhaps it was staring at his lips all night – but before he can even finish his sentence, my mouth is covering his, initiating our first kiss. I make it brief, but at the same time, it’s very endearing. His lips feel like the delicate touch of a butterfly. And just as we break apart, I get the idea that finding my rhythm won’t be as difficult as I once thought.

I hear you talkin’
Well it’s my turn now, I’m talking back
Look in my eyes
So you can see just where I’m at
I walked a thousand miles
To find one river of peace
And I’ll walk a million more
To find what this sh** means

Or maybe I’m just fooling myself. Either way, as I lead Tony through his own house and into his bedroom, I know that I’m certainly ready to try and move on.

Got stains on my T-shirt
And I’m the biggest flirt
Right now, I’m solo, but that will be changing eventually
Got bruises on my heart
And sometimes, I get dark
If you want my autobiography, baby, just ask me

:unsure: Can you tell that I'm lovin' Ashlee's CD? :lol: Your turn.</span>

<span style='color:hotpink'>Book Excerpts: Prologue/Chapter 9 "Portrait" - Toni Morrison (Love)
Lyrics: "Autobiography" - Ashlee Simpson (Autobiography)</span>

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Postby justins bubbles » Thu Jul 22, 2004 11:01 pm

<span style='color:blue'>Woo hoo for being first! :yay: Another great chapter and I must say that I do have mixed emotions about her moving on... On one side I'm happy she's gettin' some of that Tony :drool: But Justin's pushin' the girls of left and right! :unsure: Isn't supposed to be the other way around? :lol: Just kidding... great work! And I'm feeling Ashlee too. :nod:</span>

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Postby megzrsa » Sat Jul 24, 2004 1:30 pm

Great chapter! Im the same as bubs, im not sure i want chelle to move onto Tony but then again its best she does :unsure: hmmm maybe she'll try him and then realise Justin is better :lol:
Anyway more please! :P

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Mon Jul 26, 2004 10:32 am

<span style='color:limegreen'>Hola mamacitas. I wrote this chapter on like Friday, and forgot to post it. :lol: It's pretty boring and I guess you could call it a filler chapter, but the next is on it's way, so... yeah. *Njoy! :kiss:

<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:dodgerblue'>Chapter 27

Man, I can’t believe that May got here so damn fast. It seems like just yesterday, it was March. Where does the time go?

I’ve been promoting this movie for the past two weeks, and I think I’m seriously going crazy. Luckily, the last big stop is on Oprah, and that’s today. Hopefully, this will be quick, slick, and to the point.

I sat backstage at The Oprah Winfrey show – is it still called that? – letting people dap makeup on my face while I thumb through the latest People Magazine. It was either that, or O, and I really wasn’t about to even pretend to read that. Plus, Michelle was on the cover of People with Tony, so there wasn’t even a point in trying to act like I didn’t care. Rumor has it, they’ve been dating for the past month or so. I haven’t talked to her, so I wouldn’t know, but if so, then… good for her.

Five minutes until she calls me out, and I’d be lying through my beautiful teeth if I said I wasn’t nervous. But, at least I look good. My suit is wrinkle-free; I’ve got on real shoes for the first time in probably four or five years; fresh haircut; the bling is in place – I think the only way to describe me right now is pimp.

From where I am, I can hear Oprah beginning her introduction. The butterflies are mounting, but at the same time, I’m excited about doing this stupid ass show. Plus, Morgan Freeman is coming out 10 minutes after me, so nothing can go too wrong.

“Ladies, and gentlewomen, it’s Justin. Timberlake!â€￾

As the applause were prompted, Rock Your Body was the soundtrack when I quickly made my way to the stage entrance, carefully peeking as I always do, before greeting the crowd. To my surprise, they stood, while Oprah and I embraced and pretended that we didn’t just see one another backstage when exchanging pleasantries.

The tint of the set made me feel like I was sitting inside a tangerine, but instead of complaining, I sat down with Oprah on the big yellow leather loveseat and smiled at the audience while the commotion died down.

“My first question,â€￾ Oprah started, slapping my thigh, “What on Earth took you so long!â€￾

The audience cheered while I laughed. “I don’t know. I guess it’s been long overdue, huh?â€￾

“I was thinking that you were avoiding me, Justin!â€￾

“No, no, nothing like that. You know, I just get weirded out by doing these kinds of things, ‘cause I’m just not – you know, I get nervous in these kinds of settings.â€￾

“Why is that? Too much focus on you?â€￾

“Yeah, exactly. If it were just you and me, I’d love to have a one-on-one conversation, but it’s just weird, you know? You have the people here,â€￾ I said, gesturing towards them, “And then there’s the cameras, and just… wow.â€￾


“But I’m glad to be here, though.â€￾

“Yeah, you better be. And you’re gonna come back, too.â€￾

I crossed my fingers, giving her my fake chuckle. “If all goes well…â€￾

“So, Justin, this is your first big movie. How crazy was it for you to come straight off of *NSYNC to go and start something totally different.â€￾


“And not just ‘solo album’ different. We’re talking ‘movie’ different, folks. What was that like?â€￾

“You know, I’d been wanting to do a film for a really long time, but I didn’t wanna do a movie just to say, you know, ‘Hey, I made a movie back when I was 24.’ I wanted it to be like, the right project. So once that came into place, doing the actual movie was a blast.â€￾

“I bet. You certainly picked a good one. Not only did you get Morgan Freeman, but also Kevin Spacey? Honey, who is your agent?â€￾

As if on cue, everyone laughed, including myself before I attempted to answer. “I- I’m just blessed I guess.â€￾

“You are. You definitely are,â€￾ she agreed, nodding animatedly. “Okay, ‘Edison’ opens on May 12th, and our audience just saw it. Loved it!â€￾

God, this cheering after every comment is gonna drive me crazy. “Did y’all really like it?â€￾ I asked once the audience quieted. More clapping. “Good.â€￾

“It was an excellent movie,â€￾ Oprah commented. “I really think you picked a perfect project – great debut.â€￾

“Thank you.â€￾

“And you played a journalist –“

“Aspiring journalist,â€￾ I interrupted, nodding.

“Right. So tell me – because I know you had to do some research for this role – but was it hard pulling off the brainy college graduate-turned-reporter?â€￾

“No, I’m not as dumb as I look,â€￾ I laughed, as did the audience.

“No, I know! But it’s a big leap. You’re a musician, into basketball and golf, right?â€￾


“So I imagine that you really had to hone your skills coming into this.â€￾

“Well yeah, like you said, I did have to do research. I hung out with a couple of journalists out in L.A. for a while, and you know, basically became their shadow. And then, even while I was onset in Vancouver, they had me speak to investigative reporters, so I got a chance to become very familiar with what I was doing.â€￾

“See, people, that is how you do a breakout role.â€￾

“Well yeah, I didn’t wanna suck.â€￾

“You certainly didn’t suck. And I guess it helped that your girlfriend was also a journalist, correct?â€￾

Oh boy, I knew it was coming. “Yeah, exactly.â€￾

“Did she help you at all?â€￾

Yeah, she helped ruin my life. “She did what she could,â€￾ I nodded, “But she was my publicist at the time, so she was a lot more focused on that.â€￾


“Plus, she was an entertainment journalist, and I was researching investigative reporting.â€￾

“Well shoot, you should’ve looked me up. You know, back in the day – probably before you were even born – I did some reporting of my own.â€￾

“I did know that, actually. I should’ve given you a call.â€￾ I smiled, “Next time.â€￾

“Next time.â€￾

As I noticed Jourdyn sitting in the 2nd row of the audience, I subliminally heard Oprah asking another question, but didn’t really comprehend anything that she’d said. “I’m sorry, what?â€￾

“Justin, you’re not listening to me?â€￾

People laughed as I looked down in slight embarrassment. “I’m so sorry. I saw a friend of mine sitting in the audience and I blanked out.â€￾

“Oh, well who’s your friend?â€￾

“Right there,â€￾ I pointed as she waved. “Second row.â€￾

“She’s gorgeous. What’s her name?â€￾


“Hi, Jourdyn.â€￾

“Hey, Oprah!â€￾ she yelled from her seat.

“So is that like a girlfriend?â€￾ Oprah directed back to me.

“No, no, Jourdyn has been a friend – one of my closest friends, actually – for like, eleven years now?â€￾

“Really? You like him?â€￾ she asked Jo.

“Eh. Usually.â€￾ She smiled when the fellow audience members laughed at her smart-ass comment.

“He’s not always this sweet, is he?â€￾ Oprah was just on a roll.

“Well, he tries to be.â€￾

“That’s all that counts, I guess.â€￾

“Yeah, that’s what counts,â€￾ I jumped in.

“So, Justin, my question was, do you think you’ll do another movie in the future?â€￾

“I’d like to,â€￾ I nodded. “If the feedback is good, I think I’d like to do that in the very near future.â€￾

“We’ll be right back with Justin Timberlake,â€￾ she smiled to the camera.

While we pretended as if we were going to commercial, the crowd screamed, the crew added extensions to the couch, I took a sip of water and we watched a clip of ‘Edison.’ It was a rather unsettling scene in the movie, because I basically get my ass kicked, but when it finished, people seemed to enjoy it, so I was glad for that.

“Was that painful?â€￾ Oprah finally inquired.

“Not, so much. Although LL did kinda jack me up for real.â€￾


“Yeah,â€￾ I chuckled. “But hey, that’s what acting is about. I took a hit for the home team.â€￾

We laughed as Oprah decided to totally switch gears. “Now, Justin, I was talking to your good friend Britney Spears the other day—“

I looked around nervously, hoping that over four years since our breakup would put some kind of separation between us. “Okay…â€￾

“I know, I know. It’s 2006 and you want it to be over. But no, we talked about her recent divorce with, you know, that guy.â€￾

“Kevin, yes.â€￾

“Yeah, and we discussed the hardships of breaking up in Hollywood.â€￾

“It sucks,â€￾ I interrupted.

“I’m sure that no one knows that better than you.â€￾

“Just the fact that we’re having this conversation says that,â€￾ I laughed. So did she. So did the audience.

“You’re very right. But I just wanted to ask you – what do you think the fascination is with celebrities and their personal lives.â€￾

“Oprah, I have no idea, whatsoever!â€￾

“Good, you don’t either.â€￾

“Not at all. I mean, I understand wanting to know, because I’m a nosy person, myself. But I’m not gonna pry into someone’s broken heart just for the satisfaction of knowing.â€￾

“Right. People are just anal.â€￾

“Perfect word to describe it. They are. I mean, you have the tabloids second-guessing your relationship every two weeks. And then, when you do break up, it’s supposed to be this big shocker.â€￾


“And it’s just like, ‘What the hell?’ You just said that I’d hit Splitsville last week, you know?â€￾

“I do know. I definitely do know, Justin.â€￾

“I mean, I dunno. I just think that Hollywood, in itself, it’s a crazy place.â€￾

“And yet, you still live there?â€￾

“Well,â€￾ I began, trying to think of something legitimate, “Yeah, it’s crazy. But Los Angeles is also beautiful, and the energy there is very refreshing. Not to mention, that’s where my job is.â€￾

“You have enough money to fly to L.A. when you need to, don’t you? I know you do.â€￾

I threw my head back and laughed. She has a lot to learn about me. “Oprah, I ain’t spending money on nothin’ I don’t have to.â€￾

“Oohh, excuse me.â€￾

“No, but I’m not complaining about it, because realistically, if I didn’t love it, I wouldn’t be there. But just, with the paparazzi stalking and the ego everywhere you turn, it definitely gets weird.â€￾

“The paparazzi. I imagine that’s an everyday occurrence for you?â€￾

“Not as much as it used to be, but it is very often.â€￾

“Are they after you more, now that you’re solo again, or were you and Michelle a big target?â€￾

Damn, I thought we were done with the Michelle inferences. “Umm, I’d say that they’re after me more, now. They wanna see how I’m nursing my broken heart,â€￾ I replied, rolling my eyes dramatically.


“Plus, Michelle didn’t do the whole photographer deal. She’d just give them this look and they’d back off.â€￾

“Yeah, they back off the sistas,â€￾ Oprah joked.

“Girl, yeah,â€￾ I snapped, perfecting my blaccent.

“You took a dip in the chocolate, huh?â€￾

“I got me some chocolate, Oprah.â€￾

“That’s beautiful,â€￾ she laughed with the crowd. “I have to say I was surprised.â€￾

“What? That she was black?â€￾


“Why?â€￾ I chuckled nervously.

“Well let’s see. Before that, we heard about Britney, Alyssa, Cameron. Totally unexpected.â€￾

“Yeah, it was unexpected to me, too. But she’s such a beautiful person, I just couldn’t help but fall in love.â€￾

“So what happened to that?â€￾

“You know, we just – actually, I’m gonna tell you what we said. We agreed that we would only stay together as long as we wanted to. And just, with us working together, it really pulled us apart.â€￾

“She was your publicist, right?â€￾

“Right. And so, we thought maybe absence would make the heart grow fonder, but … it didn’t,â€￾ I chuckled.

“I see.â€￾

“So eventually, we decided that it would just be best to move on. And I really believe that whatever is meant to be will be.â€￾

“You still love her?â€￾

“I’ll always love her.â€￾ Just my luck, while I’m in the midst of fake contentment, they plastered a huge picture of Michelle and me at the VMAs on the screen behind us. “Wow.â€￾

“Wow, what?â€￾

“No, that just seems like so long ago.â€￾

“What was that? About 9 months ago?â€￾

“Yup.â€￾ I looked at the floor blankly, waiting for the next set of questions.

“Have you moved on yet?â€￾

“Not yet. I’m waiting it out – though it appears she already has,â€￾ I dismally answered.

“Well if it’s any consolation, Justin, you look good.â€￾ The crowd clapped with Oprah. “He does, doesn’t he? You got the GQ look going on. Stand up for me.â€￾

Oh, Lord. I stood up and walked across the stage as if I was a model, just to humor her and the cheering audience. “Yeah?â€￾

“Yeah! Pinstripe suit, I know those shoes are Kenneth Cole, right?â€￾

“If you say so.â€￾

“Yes. Come here.â€￾ She studied my shoes momentarily and nodded. “Yes, definitely.â€￾

“Well, hey, I couldn’t come on Oprah lookin’ busted.â€￾

“Even with a broken heart, you’re workin’ it.â€￾

“Even with a broken heart,â€￾ I agreed with a defeated nod.

She smiled in my direction and then back to the camera. “We’ll be right back.â€￾</span></span></span>

Eh, you don't have to feed back on this one. :lol: </span>

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Mon Jul 26, 2004 2:27 pm

Eh, you don't have to feed back on this one.   :lol:

YES WE DO! :nod: I'm leaving double, in fact. :lol: Great chapter! I love how goofy Justin was with Oprah. But it's both sad and beautiful to see that he is still holding out for Chelle to return. :wub:

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Tue Jul 27, 2004 8:06 pm

<span style='color:limegreen'>Well, I promised more soon, so here it is. :D Thanks for the undying love, Paige. :kiss: I suppose I've lost my two Angels. :(

Anywho, I tried something a little different for this chapter, so hopefully, it's not too confusing. Or too boring, for that matter. :unsure: I think the song really works for the vibe of this chapter, so if you can, I'd go listen to Alicia Keys's "Mr. Man" while reading... if it doesn't distract you. :lol:

<span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='font-family:Times'><span style='color:dodgerblue'>Chapter 28</span>
<span style='color:blueviolet'>Mista M

<span style='color:dodgerblue'>JC’s release party. I wasn’t ready for it, and I certainly didn’t want to go, knowing that Michelle would be there, but JC is my friend and I’m gonna support him no matter what. Plus, Syd would kill me if I didn’t show up, since they’re dating now, so I convinced Jourdyn to leave Brandon’s side for a while and be my date to the party.

We sat in the back of Lonnie’s Yukon, Jourdyn staring at me from across the seat while fidgeting with the hem of her short, black dress. “Justin?â€￾

Without even removing my transfixed gaze from her crossed, caramel legs, I replied, “Yeah?â€￾

“You’re wearing real shoes – without me having to make you? Are you all right?â€￾

I had on the black Valentino suit that she sent me for my birthday with a light blue shirt underneath, and once again, I’m wearing a real pair of shoes. “I’m growin’ up, I guess.â€￾

“I like it,â€￾ she acknowledged. “I just might have to take you back, homie.â€￾

We laughed, pulling up to Los Angeles’s Spider Club where the photographers were already in full force. From the car, I could see the backdrop, bearing the album title, Juicy, amongst the many names of party sponsors. I have to say that Michelle did one hell of a job putting this together, from what I can tell.

I happily helped Jourdyn from the car and she escorted me into the club, where I was met with the distinct scent of wine and the sound of *NSYNC’s ‘Girlfriend’ pulsating through the speakers. The groove of that beat is ridiculous, so bumpin’ it at it’s loudest is certainly a great way to revive a 5-year-old song.

Before I even attempted to make my rounds in the crowded venue, I spotted JC with Sydney clung to his arm, laughing animatedly with another person that I couldn’t quite make out. Naturally, I motioned to join them, dragging Jo with me.

I hadn’t yet the point at which JC and Syd were standing when my legs involuntarily stopped moving, and I kind of just stared in awe.

<span style='color:blueviolet'>God, I’ve dreaded this day for so long. I knew it was coming, and that there was no way to really avoid it, but I’m so not ready for it.

There he is, mere feet from me. It’s been forever since we’ve stood face to face, it’s like meeting a stranger for the second time. I know that doesn’t make sense, but in my head, it does.

Four months isn’t an eternity, but when you’re used to seeing and being with a person for two years, unfamiliarity sets in when they disappear. Apparently, he feels the same way. He’s been standing there staring at me for the past two minutes. And I haven’t heard a word that JC has said since I noticed Justin.

I look around for Tony, hoping that he can save me from whatever insecure, subliminal panicking that I’m bound to put myself through if I have to pretend that I’m not staring in Justin’s direction anymore. Alas, Tony, the king of business, is nowhere to be found, so I’m pretty much on my own.

“Michelle, are you okay?â€￾ Sydney interrupts my thoughts.

“Yeah, fine. Why?â€￾

She follows my gaze to see Justin, in all his fine-ass glory, walking in the opposing direction with Jourdyn. Damn it.

“Go talk to him,â€￾ she finally states.

“No, no, I should probably just leave him alone.â€￾

JC wanders elsewhere as we finish our conversation. “You can’t ignore him all night,â€￾ Sydney informs me.

“Can I try?â€￾

She rolls her eyes with a sigh. “Okay, he’s headed for the bar. Talk to him before he gets drunk, girl.â€￾

I wish I didn’t feel so desperate to talk to him. Or hell, even see him. But I am. So I check my little baby blue dress to make sure that everything is in order, and saunter to the bar casually, hoping that my motives aren’t too obvious.

~ ~</span>

<span style='color:dodgerblue'>Something about the way you smiled at me just drove me wild

I waited patiently for her to join me at the bar, knowing that she wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to entice me by ignoring me, at the very least. Little does she know, that tiny baby blue dress she’s wearing, and hugging all the right curves was enough to keep me enthralled for an eternity. I couldn’t wait to get a close-up of her perfection. From afar, all I could tell was that these four months have certainly treated her well. She’s lookin’ more bootylicious than Beyoncè in heat, and she’s headed straight for me.

Unfortunate for me, my phone vibrated, and while something told me not to answer, I saw that my mother was calling and I just had to.

Still, Michelle, in all her boldness, came up next to me, amid my conversation, smiled in my direction, and proceeded to order herself a drink.

“Mom, I’ll call you back,â€￾ I said into the phone, never hearing a word she said. Hanging up, I looked back to Michelle. “Hi.â€￾

“Hi,â€￾ she smiled again.

Wish I could know if you’re alone
Don’t wanna cramp your style

For some reason, the moment wrapped me in speechlessness, and I knew that she could tell.

“How are you?â€￾ she initiated.

“I’ve seen brighter days,â€￾ I admitted. “But otherwise, I’m good.â€￾

“Good.â€￾ She took a sip of her drink and nodded.

“How are you?â€￾ I asked.

“I’m better than I was.â€￾


As if a director had cued him, the infamous Tony Mirano appeared at Michelle’s side, enveloping her into his embrace. “I’ve been looking all over for you, baby.â€￾ His accent annoys me already.

“Hey, you.â€￾ She smiled to herself when he kissed her cheek, and I immediately got the urge to puke.

Instead, I stood from my seat and offered Tony my hand. “Justin Timberlake. Nice to meet you.â€￾

“Oh, I’m so rude,â€￾ Michelle realized. “Tony, this is my friend, Justin. Justin, this is Tony.â€￾

He shook my hand and gave me a fake grin. “I’m very fond of your work, Mr. Timberlake.â€￾

“Justin,â€￾ I corrected him.

“If you’re free anytime soon,â€￾ he went on to say, “I’d love it if we could get into the studio.â€￾

Oh, he wants to work with me now. What about when *NSYNC wanted him? Son of a... “That sounds great.â€￾

“Great. You just call me when you’re free.â€￾ He pulled a business card from his navy suit jacket and handed it to me, before coolly ordering himself a glass of wine.

I looked at Michelle, who looked back at me nervously. I’m not sure what it is about her, but something just doesn’t seem right. At the same time, she seems so perfect. “So, where are you two headed?â€￾ I asked, seeing that they seemed antsy about leaving the bar.

“Just to do some mingling,â€￾ Tony answered. “Maybe to V.I.P.â€￾

I nodded wondering where Jourdyn had disappeared to. “Well, Tony, it was nice finally meeting you.â€￾


I plastered a sign of happiness on my face, despite the fact that as they walked away, my heart was basically strewn across their path.

I studied every move that Michelle made – I didn’t even try to act like I didn’t. Every glance, every smile, every word – it was as if I were seeing her for the first time, and falling in love all over again. So much was the same, yet so much had changed. Her new hair, her new attitude… her new man.

But I cannot deny the feel that I feel when I look straight into your eyes
Feel my heart beating fast
For a challenge, may you rise

<span style='color:blueviolet'>Like the way you’ve given me attention through the night
Maybe I’ve had too much Remy
My man’s right by my side
Every time I catch you watching me, feel something down my spine
I’ll play the game – it’s just for fun
And only for tonight
All night

I don’t know how many more innocent glimpses I can take tonight. I’m not sure how much longer I can act as if he’s not standing across the room; as if I don’t know him. Honestly, it’s driving me crazy, and I’m not even sure why I’m doing it. It’s as if I’m avoiding him for his sake, but I’m starting to believe that it’s actually for me.

Tony has been treating me like a queen all evening, introducing me to his friends, and parading me around on his arm, approximating the notion that I’m some kind of prize. I don’t mind, and I don’t even think he’s doing it on purpose. I just feel extremely empty right now, and I’m not totally sure that he’s the one to change that lack of emotion that’s been eating at me for so long.

Finally, I get tired of frontin’ and, with much trepidation, leave Tony & Co. to head to the table where Justin, Sydney, and Jourdyn are engaged in conversation. The sneaky b****es escape before I reach them, but in a way, I’m glad, because I’m being selfish tonight. I want Justin all for myself… I think.

Carefully sitting across from him, I simply stare without uttering a word.

“If you just came to stare, you were doing it a lot better from over there,â€￾ he winks, pointing across the dark club.

“How’d you see me from over there?â€￾

“I felt it.â€￾

God, he hasn’t changed a bit. Not where it counts, anyway. I laugh and peek at the watch that’s decorating his wrist. “So…â€￾


“You look good.â€￾ And damn, does he ever. In all the time I’ve known him, he’s had weird curly hair, and a pretty clean-shaven look about him, for the most part. Now, his curls are totally shaved off, he’s got an incredibly neat goatee workin’ for him, and he’s all GQed up. He actually looks like a 25-year-old – and a fine one, at that.

“You’re pretty easy on the eyes, yourself.â€￾

“Thanks.â€￾ This is more awkward than I would have wanted. “Congratulations on winning more Grammy’s.â€￾


“So what’s that? Six for you?â€￾

He nods, staring at the empty glass in front of him. “Hey, thanks for my birthday gift.â€￾

“Oh, so you did get it.â€￾



“What? I wasn’t supposed to get it?â€￾

“No, you were. I just figured that you’d call to say ‘Thank You.’ Or send a card. Or maybe e-mail, or something.â€￾ Way to make this even more uncomfortable, Chelle.

“Oh. Well yeah, you know, the way things were left between us, I wasn’t sure whether you would have wanted me to.â€￾

I see he’s still full of sh** when he wants to be, too. Finishing off what was left of my Bacardi O and Strawberry Coke, I rise from the table, urgently wanting to end this conversation. “Can I get you another drink?â€￾

He looks up at me with an uneasy glow about his face. “Uhh, sure.â€￾

“What are you drinking?â€￾

“Surprise me.â€￾

I catch Jourdyn’s eye from a couple of seats away and signal for her to join me on my trek to the bar. Excitedly, she hops up, almost running to walk with me.

“So?â€￾ She looks at me eagerly, as if I’m supposed to know what she’s getting at.

“So, what?â€￾

“So are you two getting back together, or what?â€￾

I let out a loud cackle, which I hope answers her question. “Not even close, honey.â€￾

“Well what’s taking so long?â€￾

“Perhaps the fact that that hasn’t even crossed our minds.â€￾ I look at her as if she’s crazy before ordering two drinks and passing the bartender my credit card. “Plus, I have a boyfriend.â€￾

She yawns, signifying her boredom and turns to view the club clientele. “Chelle, I don’t even see your little boyfriend. He probably left, which means that you should probably just go home with J.â€￾

“Girl, what are you on?â€￾ I laugh. “He’s sitting right over there… with Justin.â€￾ Oh, sh**.

“That should be an interesting conversation,â€￾ Jourdyn concedes.

You can say that again.

~ ~</span>

<span style='color:dodgerblue'>“So you know Michelle pretty well?â€￾ Tony the Tiger has a keen interest in me all of a sudden, and I don’t really think I like it. It could be the fact that Michelle hasn’t even bothered to mention me to him that’s really pissing me off, but the situation right now is pretty unpleasant.

“Yeah, I’ve known her about two and a half years.â€￾

“Good friends?â€￾


“So can you tell me, does she like to travel?â€￾

I shrugged, half wondering what he was getting at. “I think she kinda has to in this industry.â€￾

“This is true. But I mean, do you think she would like to go on a trip with me to my home?â€￾

“Where is your home?â€￾

“Italy - Florence.â€￾

“Is that the place with all the water?â€￾

“That’s Venice,â€￾ he replied, chuckling at my ignorance.

“Oh. Well then, yeah, I guess she’s game for anything.â€￾ I noticed Michelle quickly approaching the table with our drinks and a disheveled expression. Before Tony could detect her presence, or say another word, I excused myself to cut off Michelle’s path.

“Hey, where are you going?â€￾ she asked in confusion, handing me a glass.

I smoothly coerced her in another direction by the small of her back, taking a sip of whatever she’d given me. “Your man is back there giving me the third degree,â€￾ I whispered into her ear.

“About what?â€￾ she asked timidly.

“Don’t worry. I didn’t tell him that we dated.â€￾

A look of calm overcame her soft brown features and she flashed those dimples that always melt my heart. “Thank you.â€￾

I wanna know if you feel the way I do
I wanna know if there’s a chance for me and you

“Thanks for the drink,â€￾ I proclaimed, referring to my whiskey on the rocks. “You know me so well.â€￾

“Was there ever any doubt about that?â€￾

“Not really.â€￾ I smiled and she smiled back at me as we made laps around the party, trying our best to hear one another over the bass of JC’s song that was booming. “Can we get outta here for a few minutes?â€￾


“I said, can we get out of here?â€￾

“And go where?â€￾

“I dunno. Just a little drive, or something.â€￾

I noticed the air of apprehension that crossed her face before she grinned at me tensely. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.â€￾

If there’s no way, meet at the bar and say you can’t

I gently kissed her on the cheek before whispering, “Just think about it.â€￾

‘Cause I don’t wanna be unfair to Mister Man

<span style='color:blueviolet'>I wanna know what makes you feel the way you do
I think you’re hoping there’s a chance for me and you

I watch as he walks away, making his charismatic presence known elsewhere. I’d love to follow him, but my common sense won’t let me. Instead, I turn towards my original destination, and join Tony at our table.

“Where’d you disappear to, once again?â€￾

“I went to get another drink and got a little caught up with a friend.â€￾

“I just talked to your friend, Justin,â€￾ he announces. “Nice guy.â€￾

“He’s a very nice guy,â€￾ I agree, fiddling with the ice left in my glass. “What did you talk about?â€￾

“Oh, a little bit of music; some sports; JC and his album.â€￾ He pauses as if waiting for a reaction from me. “You.â€￾

Finally, I look up at him. “Me?â€￾

“Yeah. And I’m glad I talked to him.â€￾

Ugh, Justin is such a liar. He said he didn’t tell Tony we dated. “Baby, I can ex—“

“He said that you liked to travel, which made me very happy, because I want you to come to Italy with me next month.â€￾

Oh. “I’m sorry,â€￾ I sputter, “Did you say that you wanted to take me to Italy?â€￾

“Is that not okay?â€￾

“No! I mean, yes, it’s great! I just – I’m shocked.â€￾

“So you’ll go? You don’t have to say yes right now.â€￾

“I’ll have to check my schedule,â€￾ I maintain, “But I think that it’ll be yes.â€￾

“What’s ‘yes?’â€￾ Justin suddenly appears behind Tony, requesting information that his inquisitive nature always demands that he has.

“Tony just asked me to come to Italy with him,â€￾ I answer.


Tony pulls his cell phone from his pocket, and it’s blinking, indicating that he has a call. “If you’ll excuse me.â€￾

I nod graciously, relieving his presence, watching Justin sit down in his seat. “So what’s your answer to my question?â€￾ Justin requests.

Should I meet you at the bar and say we can’t?
‘Cause I don’t wanna be unfair to Mister Man

I look at him with more envy, longing, and emotion than I even knew I had. It could be the fact that he looks better than I ever remember, or that I’m remembering so much of what I tried to leave behind, but my heart is telling me to just go and not look back. But then, I do look back, and I see Tony gazing intently… Lovingly.

“Chelle, are you rollin’ with me, or what?â€￾

I know all you wanna know is answers

“I don’t know yet, J.â€￾</span>

<span style='color:dodgerblue'>Cause you can give me what I need
We both know that we’re attracted

<span style='color:blueviolet'>Should we let our desires be?</span></span></span>

<span style='color:limegreen'>:blink: If anything, that was a colorful one, eh? :lol: I actually do want your thoughts on this one, so even though the next is written, I'm gonna hold off on posting it until I think everyone has read it. B) Anddddd.... go! :P</span></span>

<span style='color:hotpink'>Lyrics: "Mr. Man" - Alicia Keys ft. Jimmy Cozier (Songs in A Minor)</span>

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Postby megzrsa » Wed Jul 28, 2004 6:24 pm

Ash i love you :hug: You are such an amazing writer you know that right? :lol:
I loved both of those chapters, just great!
I loved how you gave both of their views on the situation as it happened, and how it seemed so realistic :P
I really hope that she will go with Justin, i don't like them being awkward they need to hook up again :nod: when Justin said he felt like he was falling in love with Chelle all over again :wub:
Go with him girl! :P

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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sat Jul 31, 2004 10:52 am

I'm all caught up....FINALLY! Dang i've only been able to read the chapters slowly cause of working now i dont have much time but i made it my mission to read it today and boy am I glad that I did....

Chelle needs to go with Justin man...they need to talk to each other...they're both still crazy about each other thats i just hope that they can put their pride aside and work things out....

I'm not liking this trip with Tony though...I'm gettin a bad feeling about that for some reason...i'll guess we'll have to see how that goes :nod:


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Postby Sarah » Sat Jul 31, 2004 3:59 pm

Another great chapter ash! michelle needs to go with Justin, its obvious that they both want to talk to each other shes just got to admit it to herself! lol
I'm not liking this Tony guy, i duno he just doesn't seem right if ya know what i mean! lol
update soon! :P

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Postby justins bubbles » Sun Aug 01, 2004 4:48 pm

<span style='color:blue'>Ash Ash Ash... :no: You put all us other writers to shame. You're amazing girl. :nod: And I love how you incorportated Mr. Man in to Mista Mirano--the title and the chapter.

All the built up feelings are coming back and I hope that they explode all ova the place! :lol: And Syd and JC! Oh and I LOVED the title of JC's new album. :wub: :lol: Oh, but I sense the end is near... :unsure: :cry:</span>

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Sat Aug 07, 2004 12:45 pm

<span style='color:limegreen'>Well, glad y'all still like it. :lol: More? Yep. Yay? I hope. :P
<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:blueviolet'>
Chapter 29
Grown or Outgrown?

The prospect of Justin working with Tony was always particularly disconcerting to me, but I knew it was inevitable. In fact, they should work together, because they’re two amazing musicians with a great handle on what they’re doing, and it’s been long overdue.

Still, when Tony called and asked me to meet him at the studio, the butterflies in my stomach went full blast. I mean, not only is the date freaky – 6/6/06, but the prospect of being alone with Tony and Justin is just horrific.

I’m hanging out at Center Staging, watching JC rehearse for his upcoming video and tour, so I’m a bit disappointed to have to leave, because now, I have to bother someone to take me to Burbank. During a break, one of JC’s backup dancers, a fellow Michelle, agrees to give me a lift, and we pile into her Explorer, headed for Enterprise Studios.

Arriving relatively quickly after being caught in 5 o’clock Los Angeles traffic, I politely thank Michelle and scramble inside. “Hey, Audrey,â€￾ I smile and greet the receptionist.

“Michelle! I haven’t seen you in forever, girl.â€￾

“It has been a while, I know.â€￾

“I heard about your trip to Italy! How was it?â€￾

“Awesome. Amazing. Beautiful. It was just – it was great.â€￾

“Oohh, you’re so lucky!â€￾

“I know, I know. But I’d been so busy with JC’s album coming out and everything, I really needed that break.â€￾

“Girl, I heard about him going gold in one week. You must be doing an awesome job.â€￾

“Yeah, I guess I’m doing something right. But he’s the talent – I just get him out there,â€￾ I laugh.

“I hear ya.â€￾

“Do you know where Tony and Justin are?â€￾

She flips through a stack of papers that are clung to a clipboard on her dysfunctional desk. “Hmm.â€￾

Suddenly, I hear a guitar riff that’s instantly recognizable, and it’s coming from down the hall. “Nevermind.â€￾ I smile, and head in the direction of the music, balancing my Fendi clutch underneath my arm while applying lip gloss. I know I don’t need to impress my own boyfriend. Sadly, this is for Justin’s benefit.

With each step I take down the narrow hallway, more fear settles inside me, and it’s agitating, not to mention, unnecessary. I don’t know what it is, but since seeing Justin at JC’s release party two weeks ago, I’ve been working over time to either avoid him or astound him. If I had just taken that ride with him that night, perhaps all of this could have been bypassed.

Before walking in, I wait at the door until the music stops. For one, I’d hate to interrupt the flow of creativity. Secondly, the door is automatically locked when someone is recording, so I can’t get in anyway. Justin’s honey-coated voice, resonating through the walls is heavenly, and even worse, inviting, but I remain outside until I get the impression that he’s done.

“Knock, knock,â€￾ I say, finally making an attempt at the doorknob.

I notice a smile begin to form on Tony’s tan face, but I don’t see the outcome, because my attention is immediately diverted to Justin’s joyous expression from the other side of the studio. He seems just as happy to see me as I am, him.

“Good afternoon,â€￾ Tony proclaims, embracing me.

“Hi.â€￾ I give him a peck on the cheek and try to pretend that I’m not looking at Justin, though I really am, and don’t intend to stop. “What are you boys up to?â€￾

“Just doing some arrangements and feeling a few things out,â€￾ he answers. He heads to the control panel and instructs Justin back into the waiting area where we stand.

When he retreats from the recording booth, I’m totally taken back by his wardrobe. It used to be that he’d roll out of bed to come to the studio. Today, he’s decked out in a black blazer, a white dress shirt underneath, and jeans. He’s still rockin’ the Air Force Ones, but for this occasion, it fits. I guess he’s just pimpin’ it up all around, these days.

“Hey,â€￾ he directs to me. “Where are you coming from?â€￾

“Oh, I was just at Center Staging watching JC’s rehearsals.â€￾

“How’s that going?â€￾ Tony interjects.

“It’s hot. Y’all are gonna love it.â€￾

“When do we get to see it?â€￾ asks Justin.

“Well the video for ‘Aphrodisiac’ comes out on June 20th. And then the tour, which I know you’re both gonna check out, right?â€￾

“Right,â€￾ they respond, simultaneously.

“Tour starts on the 30th – right here at Staples.â€￾

“Damn, are you his publicist or his manager,â€￾ Justin jokes.

“Shoot, it seems like I’m both.â€￾ I can’t help but notice the way his dark blue eyes glimmer when he laughs. Consequently, I stare at him longer than anyone should.

“Michelle, are you all right?â€￾ Apparently, Tony notices, too.

“Sorry, I just blanked out for a second. I’m fine.â€￾

Justin gives me a knowing stare and motions to sit down. “Tony and I were just discussing writing a song about you.â€￾

“Me?â€￾ I ask, in shock.


“Well actually,â€￾ Tony interrupts, “Justin wanted to base a song on a young woman that he’s trying to get to know, and start a relationship with, and I told him that I could work off of the same vibe, reverting back to you.â€￾

“Oh, wow. Well that’s… sweet.â€￾ I glare at Justin, somewhat unintentionally, but still wondering who the hell this woman is that he ‘wants to get to know.’

“You’ve got one hell of a man,â€￾ Justin comments, placing his Gibson guitar back in its case.

“Don’t I know it?â€￾ I rise off the heel of my white Manolo Blahnik’s to give Tony a short, celebratory kiss before smiling back at Justin. “So who’s this new woman in your life?â€￾ I finally inquire.

“Well,â€￾ he chuckles, probably knowing that that kiss was just for show, “It’s more or less about someone I was trying to get to know a couple of years ago. To be honest, I know her pretty well now.â€￾ He’s staring dead into my eyes, and, despite wanting to, I can’t find the strength to look away. “Though, lately, it seems that I’m trying to figure out who she is again.â€￾

Tony laughs, sitting down at his computer while we engage in what could become a rather intense conversation. “So do you know what it’ll be called?â€￾

“I dunno. Perhaps ‘My Belle,’â€￾ he quips.

“Ma Bella,â€￾ Tony adds, with a laugh.

“That works, too,â€￾ Justin agrees, unwilling to let his stare waver. “I wanted to call it ‘Brown Skin,’ but India took that title.â€￾

I glide my eyes across his features, not quite sure of what he’s getting at. Chances are, he’s being a smart-ass, so I decide not to play into it. “Why don’t you just make it ‘Michelle’ and call it a day?â€￾ Just in the nick of time, Tony’s phone rings and the conversation ceases so that he can talk in silence. “You’re not funny,â€￾ I whisper to Justin.

“And you’re not twelve,â€￾ he shoots back. “Grow up.â€￾

“I am grown.â€￾

“Just because you walk in here with a designer jacket straight from Italy with your big producer-boyfriend, it doesn’t mean you’re mature.â€￾

“And just because you can shave on a regular basis and now wear clothes that fit doesn’t mean you’re a normal 25-year-old, either,â€￾ I hiss back at him.

“Well, at least I can accept the fact that you’ve moved on, Michelle. That jealous green isn’t a good color on you.â€￾

“I can accept the fact that I’ve moved on, too!â€￾

“Have you? Because you don’t look too interested in Mr. Man over there,â€￾ he replies in a whisper, pointing in Tony’s direction.

“I’m more interested in him than I am in you.â€￾

“Yes, Michelle. And this is why you were damn near seeing red when you thought that I had a new woman in my life.â€￾

So I listen to you complain and then
I bite my tongue in vain again
As I let it all just slowly settle in

“I was just curious,â€￾ I lie.

He shakes his head with a malicious smile. “You’re so full of sh** that you probably actually believe what you’re saying.â€￾

Such a pretty picture that you paint
I’m so vile, while you’re a saint
Funny how your eyes see thick, not thin

“I’m full of sh** now?â€￾

“Yeah, and you have been for a long time now.â€￾

“Where do you get your nerve, Justin?â€￾

“I’m sure the fact that I know you better than you know yourself probably gets to you, but it’s about time you accept that, too.â€￾

I can only be myself
I’m sorry that’s hell for you
Hey, so what’s my damage today?
Don’t let me get in your way
Let it out like you always do

I’m more than relieved when I see Tony flipping his phone closed. With a sigh of exasperated relief, I smile back at him as if I didn’t just have a war of words with the man sitting across from me.

Tony returns a warm grin and runs a hand through his thick, black hair. “Bad news, guys.â€￾

“You gotta go?â€￾ I ask, already knowing.

“Yeah. I was supposed to meet Dave Navarro for drinks later tonight, but Carmen is going into labor, so I have to catch him at the airport to fill in a few holes before he heads to see her in New York.â€￾

“Well okay, then. Let’s get movin’,â€￾ I say, rising from the couch.

“Baby, I’m sorry, but I should do this by myself.â€￾

I wince at the thought of telling him, “I don’t have my car though, so I kinda have to go, or I’m stuck.â€￾

“Where’s your car?â€￾

“I left it at home. I rode with JC to Staging, and then I bummed a lift from Michelle over here, so…â€￾

“Damn,â€￾ Tony says, seemingly racking his brain for a solution. “I can give you mo—“

A wide grin crosses Justin’s stress-free face, and he infuses himself into our dilemma. “I can take her home.â€￾

Both Tony and I look at him, and then Tony looks at me with pleading green eyes. “Is that doable?â€￾

“If you gotta go, you gotta go.â€￾ Besides, worse things have happened.

“Thanks, babe.â€￾ He kisses me on the cheek before gathering his belongings. “Justin, I owe you.â€￾

“Think nothing of it,â€￾ Justin winks, watching me.

“Michelle, I’ll call you later.â€￾

“Later,â€￾ I nod, staring blankly at the door. Within seconds, Tony is gone, and so is any possible salvation.

With a lick of his little pink lips, Justin picks up his guitar, my small, white purse, and offers me his arm as if he were about to escort me inside the ball. “Shall we?â€￾

With a roll of my eyes, I pray that this doesn’t end up disastrous. But, as my track record goes with Justin, it will. “I suppose we shall.â€￾

The trouble between me and you is nothing new</span></span></span>

Yeah, still love Ashlee's album. :lol: Y'all know what to do. :kiss:</span>

<span style='color:hotpink'>Lyrics: "Nothing New" - Ashlee Simpson (Autobiography)</span>

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Postby justins bubbles » Sat Aug 07, 2004 1:37 pm

<span style='color:blue'>Oh yeah, I'm supposed to reply at the other party. :lol: But I loved it and I still love Ashlee's album too... :P </span>

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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sat Aug 07, 2004 9:51 pm

I wonder what's gonna happen between them on the car ride home?? I hope that something happens cause these two belong together...I have a feeling that Justin has something up his sleeve but i'm not really sure what...ahhh MORE PLEASE!!!

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Postby megzrsa » Mon Aug 09, 2004 11:34 am

There is alotta tension between them two, ugh its so obvious she still wants him back- the lipgloss, new style, still transfixed by justin :whistle: only a matter of time :nod:

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Sat Aug 14, 2004 10:42 pm

<span style='color:limegreen'>On my way out the door, into the rain, but I thought it would be a good idea to update since I have the chance. :lol: This is for you's. :kiss:</span>
<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:dodgerblue'>
Chapter 30
Hold My Jacket, And Then…

We exited the studio, through the wrath of the paparazzi, and headed to the parking lot, arm in arm. The California sun was still beaming as it was setting, providing an incredible backdrop for the ride we were about to take.

Michelle pulled off her white motorcycle jacket, scanning the parking lot in what seemed to be confusion. “Where’s your car, Justin?â€￾

“They’re all at home in my garage.â€￾

“Well then why didn’t you call Lonnie before we walked out here?â€￾

“Because I don’t need him,â€￾ I answered quickly, pulling keys out of my pocket, dragging Michelle along with me.

“You’re in someone else’s car? Because I could’ve taken a cab if it’s gonna be this much trouble.â€￾

“No, sweetheart. It’s no trouble at all.â€￾ Studying her bare, brown arms, I added, “You might wanna put your little jacket back on.â€￾

We stopped at my space in the lot, and finally catching the drift, she widened her eyes in surprise. “Your motorcycle?â€￾

“Is that a problem?â€￾

“You cannot be serious, Justin.â€￾

“What? You afraid to get your designer jeans dirty?â€￾

“Justin, if you say another word about my cl—“

“Save it,â€￾ I laughed, passing her a helmet. “I’m kidding.â€￾

“Well whatever.â€￾ She refused the helmet and looked back to the studio doors. “Can I have my purse? I’m going to call a cab.â€￾

“Nope,â€￾ I replied, stuffing her little white purse in my pocket. “I promised Tony I’d get you home, and that’s what I’m doing. So hop on.â€￾

“Justin, there’s no way in hell that I’m going anywhere on that thing.â€￾

“I know you ain’t scared,â€￾ I shot back.

“Hell yeah, I’m scared!â€￾

“Baby, you’ve ridden things a lot more dangerous than this bike,â€￾ I winked.

She yawned exaggeratedly, holding out her hand. “My purse, please.â€￾

I moved slightly so that I was standing directly in front of her, towering over her. I took the white helmet from the seat of my bike and placed it over her head. “Perfect match.â€￾ I could see her hazel eyes peering at me through the glass of the helmet, but I ignored it and smiled down at her. “Come on, I’ll take you to dinner.â€￾

She turned to face my Vespa Granturismo. “Oh, joy.â€￾ She positioned herself on the back seat and faced me. “Well, let’s get this show on the road.â€￾

I placed my own helmet over my head and straddled the front cushion. “Hold on tight.â€￾

“To what?â€￾

“Me.â€￾ I playfully patted her thigh, resting just behind my own and placed the key in the ignition. “Don’t let me go, or you just might fall,â€￾ I joked, successfully finding the irony in my comment.

“Somehow, I don’t think you’d ever let me fall,â€￾ she shouted over the rev of the engine.

Well, she’s certainly right about that.

We sped out of the parking lot and onto the streets of Burbank. At first, her grip was tense around my waist, as if she were holding on for dear life. Luckily, by the time we reached the highway, she was relaxed – at ease. It were as though she and I became one with the road, and she trusted me enough to hold on to me because she wanted to, and not because she feared that she had to.

So much wasted in the afternoon
So much sacred in the month of June
How bout you?

We arrived at the restaurant of my choice within a few precious minutes of a comforted silence between us and headed inside with a new aura surrounding us – a happier one, for sure.

“Just because that ride was so much fun, I’m not even complain about you bringing me to Red Robin, of all places,â€￾ she started, climbing off of the bike.

“You better not complain. This is good food, girl.â€￾ I smiled and reattached my arm to hers.

“Justin,â€￾ she rolled her eyes, “This is like sit-down version of McDonald’s.â€￾

“There was a time when you loved McDonald’s, you know.â€￾

“Yeah, when I was like seven.â€￾

“No,â€￾ I laughed, opening the door for her, “Remember your family reunion last year, and on our way to Six Flags, you forced us all to eat there for breakfast.â€￾

“Well yeah, that’s because it was free, baby. I don’t pass up free food.â€￾

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.â€￾ I held up two fingers to the hostess as we followed her to be seated. “I’m sure that by now, you’re used to eating at the Four Seasons every night and sh**, but this is how I get down, so I guess you’re stuck.â€￾

“Well, if this is all I can get…,â€￾ she trailed off with a smile. She plopped down into the booth, removing her jacket and gazing at me as I sat down.

“What? Why are you lookin’ at me like that?â€￾

“No reason. It’s just been so long since I’ve looked at you, I guess.â€￾

“I look the same,â€￾ I reassured her. “Just a little bit older.â€￾

“You’re acting like it’s been years,â€￾ she chuckled.

“Well, so are you.â€￾ I turned my head to see the waitress headed for us. “You know what you’re getting?â€￾

“Well,â€￾ she began, scanning the menu, “Looks like they don’t have sushi, so I’ll have to settle for a burger.â€￾

“Sushi? Michelle, how can you eat raw fish?â€￾ I suppose I inadvertently said something that was funny, because she let out a nice little laugh at my expense. “What?â€￾

“It’s good for you, J.â€￾

“There ain’t nothin’ good about that.â€￾

“You’re insane,â€￾ she smiled. “I’ve missed you.â€￾

I studied her dimples before replying, “I’ve missed you, too.â€￾

And I will wait to find
If this will last forever

We simultaneously cleared our throats and anticipated the approach of our waitress in silence before the conversation could take an awkward turn for the worst. Things were going surprisingly well, and it was apparent that neither of us wanted that to change.

“So, um, I hear you were on Oprah?â€￾

Damn, I thought I had left that in the past. “Yeah, about a month ago,â€￾ I nodded. “You didn’t see it?â€￾

“No, I didn’t hear about it until after it aired.â€￾

“Jourdyn told you?â€￾


“Well, you didn’t miss much,â€￾ I admitted.

“Just seeing you wear big-boy shoes with a suit is enough for me,â€￾ she winked.

“Hey, man, I’ve been getting good at that. It’s becoming a habit.â€￾

“Your mom said she’d send me a tape, so I’ll be able to witness it for myself.â€￾

She still talks to my mother? “You still talk to my mother?â€￾

“I’m sorry. Is that like, not allowed?â€￾

“No, it’s just that, you know, I didn’t know.â€￾ What the hell, dude.

“You still talk to my mom, don’t you?â€￾

“Yeah, how could I not?â€￾

“Well okay then,â€￾ she playfully snapped. “Just because you forgot my phone number doesn’t mean everyone else has.â€￾

“I didn’t forget your number. I just—“

“You just forgot how to dial, right?â€￾

“Girl, hush. I didn’t ever see your name on my Caller I.D.â€￾

“Whatever.â€￾ She giggled and took a sip of her newly arrived Sprite. “I guess we both just suck at this breaking up thing, then.â€￾

“Actually, I’m good at breaking up.â€￾

“If Justified is a testament to that, then I’m gonna have to disagree.â€￾

I let out a laugh that would have sent my Coke spraying all over Michelle if I hadn’t swallowed it just in time. “You ain’t right.â€￾

“You made the album,â€￾ she defended. “I’m just tellin’ it like it is.â€￾

“That was only ‘cause the b**** cheated on me. That’s not a regular occurrence, and you know it.â€￾

“Well for about the second half of our relationship, you thought I was cheating on you.â€￾

“That is not true.â€￾

“I can’t believe you’re gonna sit here and tell that lie!â€￾ she exclaimed, dropping her jaw in amazement.

“You can’t blame me, can you?â€￾


“You and JC were unbelievably close. Admit it.â€￾

“Not closer than you and me.â€￾

“Okay, so I was wrong. But I was terrified of losing you because of him.â€￾


“Instead, I lost you because of me.â€￾

“Hey,â€￾ she said, holding out her hand across the table, “We’re okay now.â€￾

I let my hand rest in hers and smiled at the fact that she’s okay. “Yeah.â€￾

And I will pay no mind
When it won’t and it won’t, because it won’t

I watched our food arrive and let it be situated in front of us while our conversation momentarily ceased. We both drenched our burgers in ketchup, as well as her fries and my onion rings, and attempted to eat in silence.

“So hey, how’s Heather?â€￾ she suddenly inquired.

“She’s good,â€￾ I lied. “You know, in spite of her divorce and everything.â€￾

“Oh, wow. I’m sorry to hear that.â€￾

“Yeah.â€￾ I took one of her fries, swirling it in her puddle of ketchup before eating it, and receiving a glare from Michelle. “What?â€￾

“God, you haven’t changed a bit,â€￾ she smiled. I made an attempt at another French fry before she grabbed my hand. “Touch my plate again, and it’s your ass.â€￾

“And you haven’t changed either.â€￾

“Not where it counts,â€￾ she replied with a mouth full of food. “Gimme an onion ring.â€￾

“Gimme got shot,â€￾ I quipped with a wink.

“You gon’ get shot if I don’t get one.â€￾

“Only if I get three fries.â€￾ She threw two potato slices on my plate and reached for one of my onion rings. “That’s only two.â€￾

“You already ate one.â€￾

“You’re such a greedy little b****,â€￾ I laughed.

“Excuse me.â€￾ The voice of a stranger interrupted us and we both turned to see a short woman, who appeared to be close to our age, standing before us.

“Yeah?â€￾ I asked, as politely as I could.

“Hi. I’m so sorry to interrupt,â€￾ she smiled, “But I was wondering if I could get your autograph.â€￾

“Oh, good, because I was wondering if I could get your number,â€￾ I joked. Her smile widened, and before she could stammer out the digits, I added, “I’m just kidding. What do you want me to sign?â€￾

She searched her purse, pulling out a map and a pen. “The name is Sylvia.â€￾ I grinned at her graciously and began to scribble out a message, while she waited patiently. “Hi, Michelle.â€￾

I looked up at Michelle who had been picking at her food in the midst of our exchange. She waved and said, “Hi,â€￾ through a mouth full of hamburger.

“You know, I read somewhere that you two broke up, but I’m glad to see that it wasn’t true,â€￾ Sylvia commented. “I’m glad that true love can conquer Hollywood rumors.â€￾

I finished off my signature and looked back at Michelle, who was nervously glancing at my plate. “Thanks,â€￾ I replied, passing her the map.

“No, thank you, Justin. Again, I’m so sorry that I interrupted, but this was a once in a lifetime thing,â€￾ she squealed.

“Don’t worry about it,â€￾ I countered. “It was nice meeting you.â€￾

“Great meeting you too.â€￾ Beaming, she went on her way.

“Well, I guess it’s nice to see that we’re sticking it out in spite of the rumors,â€￾ I laughed.

“Yeah, tell me about it. I didn’t think we’d make it, baby.â€￾ A hideous snort escaped Michelle’s nose, which made us both burst into uncontainable laughter. “Sorry about that,â€￾ she relented, after our laughs dwindled to chuckles.

“Don’t ever apologize for that smile.â€￾ I examined her eyes for the love I used to see in them, finding it to be totally in tact, as though it never left. I sighed and diverted my gaze back to my almost-empty plate. “So, tell me about Tony.â€￾

“What about him?â€￾

“I dunno, how did you two end up together, for one?â€￾

“Well, let’s see.â€￾ She awkwardly reached for her drink, taking gulps from it, and avoiding my stare. “He, umm, he took me out on a date back in March, and the rest is history.â€￾

“I like our story better.â€￾

“I’m sorry he couldn’t be so unconventional as to run into the back of my car, but he did take me to see Toni Morrison.â€￾

“Who’s he?â€￾

“She is only my favorite author.â€￾

“Oh, yeah I knew that,â€￾ I proclaimed. “She wrote your favorite book, right? The Bluest Eye.â€￾

“Wow. I’m impressed.â€￾

“See, I know a few things.â€￾

“I never said you didn’t.â€￾

“So, what else can you tell me about Mr. Man?â€￾

“Why do you call him that?â€￾ she asked with a chuckle.

“I dunno. It fits.â€￾

“It sounds kind of—“

“Does he make you laugh?â€￾

Her eyes shot towards me and then back to her soda glass. “He doesn’t make me cry.â€￾

“Do you love him?â€￾

“I can.â€￾

“You don’t.â€￾

“I will.â€￾

I sat back in the booth and looked at her expectantly. “Do you love me?â€￾

“I don’t.â€￾

“You can.â€￾

“I won’t. Not the way I used to.â€￾

“Hey, you remember when we used to play basketball in the middle of the night to settle an argument?â€￾

She smiled to herself with a nod. “Like it was yesterday.â€￾

“What do you say to a game of one-on-one, for old time’s sake?â€￾

“We have no argument to settle.â€￾

“I wanna play you for you.â€￾


“I want your heart back, Chelle.â€￾

She looked at me seriously, just before a sarcastic scoff preceded her reply. “J, this isn’t Love & Basketball.â€￾

“What’s wrong? You can’t ball anymore?â€￾

“Boy, don’t even try and insult my game like that. I’m just not gonna model my life after your favorite movie just because it worked for Monica and Quincy.â€￾

“Dude, that was like, way harsh.â€￾

“Sorry, dude, but that’s just the way it goes.â€￾

“It’s cool. I understand that hanging out with Mr. Man has got you lacking in the basketball department. I’m sure that if I challenged you to sushi-eating, or a shopping spree, you’d be all for it.â€￾

“Justin, you are gonna stop talkin’ about Mr. Man like that,â€￾ she giggled. “I mean, my man.â€￾

“You had it right the first time.â€￾

“Shut it.â€￾

“Okay, it’s only 9PM, so what do you wanna do?â€￾

“Seeing how you promised my boyfriend that you’d take me home, why don’t we do that?â€￾

“Damn, I thought we were having fun.â€￾

“I am having fun.â€￾

“So, then why would you want it to end?â€￾

“Let’s go, loverboy.â€￾ With a wink, she moved from the booth, taking her jacket and handing it to me. “No one said that it had to end.â€￾

And I will waste no time
Remaining in our lives together


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Postby PreCiouSbAbY » Sun Aug 15, 2004 1:02 am


I still have the 30 past other chapters to read, but fast forward...I missed a lot of sh**. haha But I just read these chapters...and ohh, yea u gotta update. :nod:

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Postby Sarah » Tue Aug 17, 2004 8:50 am

<span style='color:deeppink'>aww im glad that there still on speaking terms and its obvious that they still have feelings for each other! i just hope that one day they'll get back together :P
great chapter hun! update soon!</span>

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Thu Aug 19, 2004 5:47 pm

<span style='color:limegreen'>Okay, so this has gone in a completely different direction than I'd originally planned, but I think y'all will like it. :unsure: Or maybe not. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. :shrug: Y'all will probably change my mind though. :wub: Okay, I know. Shut up Ashley. :lol:

<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:blueviolet'>
Chapter 31
Maybe We’ll Fly the Night Away

We arrive at the emptiness of my apartment, unsure of exactly what our intentions are. God knows that I don’t plan on cheating on Tony tonight, but I have had a good time with Justin, and I don’t want it to end if it doesn’t have to.

He walks through my humble abode as if he owns the joint, taking note of little things… and big things – ultimately, being Justin. “I see that you got a new couch,â€￾ he comments, referring to my off-black leather sofa.

“Yeah, just last month.â€￾

“I liked your old one better. White suits you.â€￾

“Well, I got tired of white, and this is what I got now,â€￾ I answer sternly. Who does he think he is?

“Damn. I’m just telling you what looks good.â€￾

“I suppose you would know.â€￾ Blatant sarcasm. His house has enough wood to drive a damn woodpecker insane. He sits down on the new couch as if it’s threatening to devour him at first touch. “It won’t bite, Justin.â€￾

He looks up and laughs at me, probably knowing that he’s being an idiot. “You’re funny.â€￾

“You’re weird. What do you wanna do?â€￾ I ask, glancing at my watch.

“How about a tour of the bedroom?â€￾ He winks and directs his attention towards the rear of my apartment, trying to allude to some dessert to go with dinner.

“Yes, and then you woke up, loverboy.â€￾

“It was worth a try.â€￾ Without requesting permission, as Tony usually does, Justin heads for my refrigerator, my television remote in hand, and peruses its contents. “Got anything to eat?â€￾ he asks with his head invading the appliance. “I’m hungry again.â€￾

I see he still eats like an expectant mother. “Dude, Justin, we just ate.â€￾

“Do you have food, or what?â€￾

“I’m not feeding you,â€￾ I reply, hanging up my jacket. “This little rendezvous was at your expense, so you pimp it, baby.â€￾ In defeat, he closes the fridge, pulling out a cup of red Jell-O, and retreats from the kitchen, back into the living room, chuckling to himself. “What are you laughing at?â€￾

“The Jell-O.â€￾ He takes the lid off of the cup, and uses it as a scoop for the gelatin. “It just reminds me of Joey and his pool aspirations.â€￾

“Whatever happened to that dream?â€￾

“It’s mending on a shelf, along with the other sh** he won’t get to do after he gets married.â€￾

“Well he should just be thankful for Kelly,â€￾ I shoot back. “You guys never appreciate what you have.â€￾

“Oh, and you do?â€￾

“I did.â€￾

“Well, I did too. Are you trying to imply that I didn’t?â€￾

“I’m trying to imply that some people don’t see sh** for what it is until it’s too late.â€￾

“So, not only are you saying that I didn’t appreciate you, but that it’s too late to get back what we had.â€￾

I slowly circle the island in my kitchen before gracing the living room, and comforting myself in the loveseat across from Justin. “I’m not saying anything, anymore. Take it as you’d like.â€￾

He sits back in the sofa cushions and watches me with an antagonizing glare. “You know I hate when you do that.â€￾

“Why do you think I do it?â€￾

“I’m bored.â€￾

“Well, by all means, there’s the door.â€￾

“I’m not leaving without you.â€￾

“Justin, your task was to get me home.â€￾

“Yeah,â€￾ he smirks, “But that doesn’t mean you have to stay home.â€￾

With an evil glint in his navy blue eyes, he runs through my apartment to the bedroom, leaving me to wonder just what the hell he’s up to. Returning with a blanket and my car keys, my question is soon answered.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It’s now nearing 11:00PM, and we’re comfortably sprawled across a blanket, sitting in a secluded corner of Newport Beach.

The summer heat has lessened considerably, making the atmosphere cool, and more importantly, empty. We watch the waves crash against the shore, admiring the way that the moon shimmers across the ocean. We’re closer to the beach houses than we are the water, and can easily hear the music of one residence echoing throughout the mainland.

“You hear that?â€￾ Justin says to me, rising to his feet.

“The music?â€￾


“Of course I do.â€￾ I stand up with him, shrugging his blazer over my bare shoulders. “So what?â€￾

“Can you hear what it is?â€￾

“Sounds like Brian McKnight.â€￾

“That’s what I thought.â€￾ He removes his jacket from my arms, dismissing any protest I’m getting ready to have, and takes hold of my back. “Let’s dance.â€￾

I smile at him sarcastically. “Why do you always wanna dance when I’m cold?â€￾

“Just shut up and take my hand.â€￾

I do as told and let my hand be enveloped by his, and nestle my head into the warmth of his chest, swaying very slowly to the sound of Brian’s voice and the piano.

“Baby, just hold me. Simply control me. ‘Cause your arms – they keep away the lonelies.â€￾

The sound of Justin’s voice singing along sends a familiar chill down my spine – one that I grew to love, and adore – one that I’ve missed. Not only his voice, but also this song brings back so many fond memories of when the two of us first met, and first realized that our hearts needed to meet each other; that our souls needed to be freed. This dance is sending all those feelings rushing back to me, and I’m not sure that I want to ignore them.

“When I look into your eyes, then I realize that all I need is you in my life. All I need is you in my life. ‘Cause I never felt this way about loving…â€￾

We both seem to realize at the same time that tears are falling from my eyes, and I look up at him sorrowfully, hoping that my eyes can express what I don’t want my lips to allow. Still, they manage to whisper, “I love you, Justin.â€￾

He finally pulls away and looks at me in what seems to be a hopeful confusion. He sits back down on the blanket and stares into oblivion. “So what do we do now?â€￾

I join him in the sand, sitting as close to him as I can, and rest my head on his shoulder. “Right now, we live in the moment.â€￾

I feel his head shift to look down at me. “What does that mean?â€￾

My head is spinning, and I’ll probably regret everything that’s happened today by the time the sun comes up, but my heart is telling me that this may be my only chance to grasp at happiness, and I’m not willing to let it pass me by anymore.

I tilt my head so that Justin’s face is directly above mine, and without giving it a second thought, I let my lips caress his and wait for the favor to be returned. We immediately find our groove, and he methodically slides his tongue past my lips and it flirts with my own.

“Wait,â€￾ he interjects, after pulling away. “What are we doing?â€￾

“What’s wrong?â€￾

“Chelle, you have a boyfriend. We can’t do this.â€￾

I drop my head in disappointment, yet knowing that he’s annoyingly right about the situation. “You’re right. I’m sorry.â€￾ He nods and looks in the direction opposite of me, whistling to himself. “Let’s not make this awkward again,â€￾ I add. “We were doing so well.â€￾

“I think it’s a little too late for that.â€￾

“What are you thinking about?â€￾

He shrugs absentmindedly and looks up to the sky. Without warning, he turns back towards me and allows his lips to do the talking when they make a feverish attempt at my mouth. Accordingly, I suck at his bottom lip while his tongue explores the inside of my mouth, eliciting a tingling sensation in my fingers and toes. Everything is exactly the way I remember it.

He leans over my body, which is laid out across the blanket, and licks at every crevice of my neck while my fingers desperately try to unbutton his shirt without the guidance of my sight. Finally succeeding, I remove his shirt by its collar, and explore his back with my nails.

He permits his own hands to travel up my shirt, gently unhooking my bra’s front clasp, and removing it without hesitation. Intent with kissing my lips, his fingers run back and forth across my nipples, gently squeezing my breasts, enticing them. We haven’t even done anything yet, but our breathing is heavy and frenzied. We’ve both been anticipating this moment for a long time.

In the background, I still hear music, but more importantly, the steady beat of the waves, crashing against the rocks, and lapping the sand. It’s a rhythm that coincides with the beating of our hearts – like a conscientious drum. That beat sustains the vitality of everything surrounding it. It describes what to do, where to move, how to react. That internal drum is the essence of our presence.

I wanna go to a place where I am nothing and everything

The moment is chaotically serene – our hands are everywhere, as is our incessant panting. But I think that we’ve finally come to an emotional consensus. We’re working off of the same vibe, creating a poignant calmness. The very second that our lips touched, the past seemed to click right into place. We’re reaching behind what we thought to be the end and we’re finding what we once knew was most important: love.

That exists between every and nowhere

Once our clothing is somehow scattered about the sand, with clear understanding of exactly what’s about to happen, I look at him in slight fearfulness, unsure of what tomorrow will bring.

I’m sure it’s written on my face, but I have a feeling that he read my mind when he asks, “You’re sure you wanna do this?â€￾

I wanna go to a place where time has no consequence

Not only do I want to, but I need to. I have to. “I just wanna love you, baby.â€￾ Good one, Michelle.

And the skies open to my prayers

Even he can’t help but chuckle before his lips proceed to besiege the area just below my neck. As I attempt to trickle my fingers through his hair and realize that his curls are gone, the contrasting familiarity of him entering me makes my heart smile and a gives my body a welcome chill of excitement amongst the heat of our bodies colliding and the fiery passion inside of it.

If it’s true that you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone, then it’s even more accurate that you don’t realize how much you loved it until it comes back. His very first thrust gives me an unbearable shiver, symbolic of what may very well be my first orgasm in this venture for rapturous delight.

“Are you okay?â€￾ he whispers. A definitive moan of pleasure should answer his question.

I love you more than I love life itself

He moves slowly, finding a rhythm with the water below us. Still, his breath dancing against my neck is heavy and warm – corresponding to the sentiment that exists between us. I love it. I love him.

I need to find a place where I can breathe

I try to kiss his shoulders, neck, lips – anything that my mouth can reach. Instead, I wrap my legs around him and request that he makes this last forever. I don’t want to leave this moment. I don’t want to have to face the world anytime soon. I want to be able to live right here, knowing that we’re the only two people that matter, and that we’ll never have to assume another existence outside of that.

I wanna go to a place where I can hold the intangible
And let go of the pain with all my might

Harder. Faster. Deeper. He answers all my internal questions and obliges every subliminal plea. He’s gentle, yet fervent. He’s self-serving, but subservient. He’s perfect in all his imperfections. He’s what I hate to love, and at the same time, I love loving him. My ironic dichotomy. It may not make sense, but things like this – moments like this – don’t have to. The beauty of it all is what we live for.

Our writhing bodies are dripping in passionate sweat, partaking in this experience as if it were our first and last. I can feel my walls, wonderfully wet and tight, contracting, threatening to potentially enclose him inside me. I can’t say that I wouldn’t be delighted to keep him there forever.

I wanna go to a place where I’m suspended in ecstasy

Seeing past my gaze and into my soul, he smirks ever-so-slightly, knowing that we’re coming to a simultaneous conclusion. His rosy lips lavish my neck again, his tongue lashing against my skin. I slightly shiver at the dampness his mouth leaves behind when the chill of the night reaches it – nothing like the trembling sensation that’s threatening to reverberate throughout my entire being. With a resolute, blissful moan, all thought processes cease, and the only movements are our lips finding one another and completing the motions that our contented bodies will no longer allow us to engage in.

In the back of my mind, I know that I’ve made a terrible mistake. But at the bottom of my heart, I feel that I’ve just experienced the most perfect moment of my life. There’s nothing like reacquainting your soul with its mate – even if it’s at the expense of someone else’s pride.

Somewhere between dark and light
Where wrong becomes right

God, forgive me. But I couldn’t pass up my chance at finding the beautiful that was once my love – my life.

I wanna go to Beautiful

And I found it.</span></span></span>

Talk to me. :D </span>

<span style='color:hotpink'>Lyrics: "Beautiful" - India.Arie (Acoustic Soul)</span>

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Postby JTnTN » Thu Aug 19, 2004 11:48 pm

Another :notworthy:, just because. :lol:

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Fri Aug 20, 2004 7:38 am

:notworthy: Yeah, felt like doing that, too.

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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sat Aug 21, 2004 5:01 pm

:notworthy: that was one how chapter Ash...i'm speachlesss....whats gonna happen between these two?? AHH MORE PLEASE!

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Postby megzrsa » Sat Aug 21, 2004 7:10 pm

I'll add an :notworthy: :yay: Loved it :wub:

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Mon Aug 23, 2004 10:01 am

:notworthy: Cuz I feel like bowing down again! :nod: :lol:

Oooooh, I got a request for something in the future: Work the lyrics to "Wheel" by Mayer into a chapter one day.

I know that you know what you're doing already in this story, but maybe a future story could have those lyrics incorporated! :wub:

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Postby mtvjunkie » Mon Aug 23, 2004 11:55 am

:notworthy: :notworthy: see, im twice as good as everyone else :nod: :P

that mayer juice acting up again paige ;)

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Mon Aug 23, 2004 12:49 pm

:nod: Yeah Helena, the juice is stirring in me again. :wacko:

:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:

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Postby mtvjunkie » Mon Aug 23, 2004 2:21 pm

:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:


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Postby PreCiouSbAbY » Mon Aug 23, 2004 6:04 pm

:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:



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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Mon Aug 23, 2004 8:16 pm

:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:
:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:
:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:
:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: Y'all!


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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Mon Aug 23, 2004 9:09 pm

:laughup: OMG Paige that's absolutely freakin hilarious! I can't stop laughin!

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Postby whatchagot4meMRJT » Tue Aug 24, 2004 9:21 am

:rofl: Glad you liked it, Heather. :nod: I saved it to my Photobucket album, as it comes in handy way more often than it really should! :lol:

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Postby Tiff » Thu Aug 26, 2004 6:53 pm

[COLOR=red] ok im tryin my best to get caught up on this,its me tiff or angelpops13,im tryin so hard to gte caugh up. so if it takes me awhile im sorry.

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Postby mtvjunkie » Sun Aug 29, 2004 11:23 am

*cough* back to the hero worship people B)

:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:

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Postby BabyBlue2578 » Sun Aug 29, 2004 11:47 am

<span style='color:limegreen'>:lol: Gals, thanks for lovin' it. ^_^

Tiff, you can just take your time, hun. Don't worry. :hug:

<span style='font-family:Times'><span style='font-size:11pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:dodgerblue'>Chapter 32
Another Love TKO

Clear my eyes, it’s the morning after
Did I fall in love, or did I find disaster?

Somehow, I awoke the next morning in the loneliness of my own bed. My body and heart are telling me that Michelle and me had just experienced the most passionate night of our lives, but my mind is saying that it was all some kind of cruel dream.

I rolled over in my bed to answer the ringing phone, happy to see that Michelle essentially read my mind and called. “Hey,â€￾ I said, with the least amount of grogginess I could pull off.

“Good morning.â€￾ The deep voice of a man startled and disappointed me. “I was calling to see if you wanted to get into the studio this afternoon. I have a couple of free hours.â€￾

“Sure. Uh, who is this?â€￾

Again, the chuckle gave it away. Couldn’t be anyone but… “It’s Tony. I’m sorry. I thought you knew.â€￾

“Oh, sorry, man. I just woke up.â€￾

“I apologize for waking you up, then.â€￾

“No, don’t sweat it. I need to be up anyway.â€￾

“By the way, thanks for bringing Michelle home last night.â€￾

“It was my pleasure, man.â€￾ Well, at least I know that being with her wasn’t a dream. “She’s a sweetheart.â€￾

“She is. Nonetheless, I appreciate it.â€￾

“Are you over there?â€￾ I inquired, knowing the answer.

“Yeah, I’d been calling her all night, so I just wanted to make sure she was okay. Turns out the kid has been knocked out.â€￾

I laughed. I don’t know why, but I laughed. “Oh?â€￾

“Yeah, she’s still sleeping like an angel.â€￾

“I see.â€￾

“I think it’s your jacket she has on, too.â€￾

“Oh, yeah, she got cold on the way home.â€￾

“Well like I said,â€￾ he proclaimed, “Thanks for taking care of her.â€￾

“So what time do you wanna meet today?â€￾ I immediately changed subjects, knowing that the subject of my jacket could only turn to worse.

“I’m free anytime after lunch.â€￾

“Two o’clock?â€￾

“That’s just a little more than perfect.â€￾

We hung up and I went on about my business, as usual – coffee, shower, and all the ‘going somewhere today’ regiments. I hadn’t planned to even move out of bed, but I guess the studio is the best way to get Michelle off my mind. I’ll just write another song about her. That’s probably why half of the last *NSYNC record was about her, but hey – you can’t stifle creativity.

I was pulling my black and gold ‘Work Sucks’ hat over my head and on the way out to the garage when my doorbell rang. I don’t even know why I have a doorbell, because anyone that can get to it should have a key. Still, out of curiosity, I backtracked to the front of the house, finding Michelle shyly staring back at me, standing in the foyer.

“What are you doing here?â€￾ I smiled.

Her caramel eyes dropped to the wooden panels on the floor, presumably searching for an excuse. “I hope you don’t mind me coming in…â€￾

“Not at all. Is something wrong?â€￾

“Not. Really.â€￾

I walked closer to her so that I could lift her gaze to my eye level. “What’s wrong?â€￾

“I dunno. I guess I feel guilty.â€￾


She turned around to sit on the steps, adjacent to our current arrangement. “Sit down with me?â€￾

I followed and sat down two steps below her, positioning myself for a perfect view of her face. “What’s up?â€￾

“I don’t even know, dude.â€￾

“You don’t know why you’re here?â€￾

“Well, I’m here because I want to be, but I shouldn’t.â€￾

“Michelle, what are you talking about?â€￾

She giggled at her nonsensical rambling and looked me in the eye. “What do you think last night meant?â€￾

So it did happen. “That we still fit together.â€￾

“Exactly.â€￾ She sighed and let her head fall to the banister. “J, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore.â€￾

“Well, what is it that you wanna do?â€￾

“I dunno. Maybe we should just act like it didn’t happen?â€￾

Is she in-f***ing-sane? No way I’m ignoring that. “Why would you say something like that?â€￾

“It just seems easier for us to live our lives outside of each other.â€￾

She thinks it’s easier to live with a broken heart than to work on a relationship? What damn planet is she on? “Didn’t you tell me you loved me last night?â€￾

“Yes. And I meant it.â€￾

“So, then—“

“But that doesn’t mean that I’m ready to give up on Tony, or that I’m ready to go back to the insanity of you and me being together.â€￾

Is she really saying these words? “Wow.â€￾

“Justin, I’m not saying that I don’t want you back. I just – I don’t know.â€￾


“Stop saying ‘Wow,’â€￾ she laughed, hitting me in the arm. “Tell me that you understand where I’m coming from.â€￾

“I understand where you’re coming from.â€￾

“J, you were supposed to mean it!â€￾

“I do. No one said that love was easy.â€￾

She sighed again, in agreement. “What an understatement.â€￾

“So, are you gonna tell Tony what happened?â€￾

“And let his Italian temper explode on me? Hell no.â€￾

I chuckled and rose from the staircase. “Well, I hate to cut this short, but I’m due at the studio in about ten minutes.â€￾

“Oh, okay.â€￾ She stood up with me and reached in the pocket of her jeans, pulling out a set of keys. “Catch.â€￾ She threw them at me, laughing when they hit my chin.

“What’s this?â€￾

“I was gonna give you a ride back to my place so you could get your Vespa.â€￾

I forgot all about that. “I’ll come by when I leave Enterprise. You gonna be around?â€￾

“Call me,â€￾ she replied, walking back through the front door and to her car. I watched, slightly adoringly, wondering just how much more bullsh** I’m gonna have to endure. Then again, it’s only 2PM, so who knows what this day will have to offer.

“Justin,â€￾ Tony, for the third time, interrupted my singing to get my attention.

I looked across the recording booth, directing my undivided to him. “Yeah?â€￾

“I need you louder on the background vocals. The mic isn’t picking them up enough underneath that trumpet.â€￾

“Yes, sir.â€￾ Bastard. Just as the track began to play again, my phone vibrated in my pocket. Of course, it was Michelle calling. “Hey.â€￾

“Busy?â€￾ she asked.

“A little. What’s up?â€￾

“Just making sure you didn’t forget about coming over after you leave the studio.â€￾

I nervously watched Tony pull out his cell and press a button. Realization struck me like a bat and I whispered, “Hey, if Mr. Man calls, answer it.â€￾

Some intense staring went on between Tony and me as he made his call, and I was subsequently put on hold. He watched me watch him. I watched him watch me. Finally, I hung up my phone, totally onto the game that Mirano was playing. I didn’t want to lie in the first place about my affiliation with Michelle, but I’ll be damned if I get caught now.

After a few more minutes of glares and stares, Tony relieved his phone of its use and turned back to me. “Justin, can I ask you a question?â€￾

I smiled and chuckled at him, for once. “You just did.â€￾ He didn’t laugh. I looked at him expectantly, knowing that this question just couldn’t be good if he couldn’t even crack a damn smile. “What’s up, man?â€￾

“Can you tell me exactly what went on last night with you and Michelle?â€￾

Damn. Moment of truth. I removed myself from the confines of the recording booth and walked out to face this guy. “Why do you ask?â€￾

“I dunno. Just getting a weird vibe between you two.â€￾

“Well,â€￾ I started, clearing my throat, “I think that’s because there is a weird vibe between us two.â€￾

“Is that—“

“And it’s been going on for a while now, so I’m actually surprised that you’re just bringing this up.â€￾

“Before two weeks ago, I didn’t even know you were friends,â€￾ he admitted. “I thought perhaps acquaintances because of JC…â€￾

Okay, enough of this bullsh**. “Tony, we dated for two years.â€￾

His eyes shot up to the ceiling and then stared back at me – through me. “Excuse me?â€￾

“Me and Michelle – we went out, had a relationship, for about two years.â€￾

He did his infamous chuckle, though it came off a little more maliciously than I would have wanted. “You’re kidding, right?â€￾

How does he not know this sh**? “Sorry, man.â€￾

“So, neither of you thought it necessary to tell me?â€￾

I shrugged and looked in any place I could, outside of his fiery green eyes. “Michelle obviously didn’t want you to know, so I respected that.â€￾

There was pure silence between us for about five minutes before he licked his teeth and squinted at me. “Can you answer my question?â€￾

He didn’t even say anything. What the hell is he talking about? “What question?â€￾

“What the f*** happened last night, Justin.â€￾

“All right, calm down, dude.â€￾

“Quit stalling.â€￾

Well, here comes the coup de grace. “We went to dinner, and—“

“Where?â€￾ he interrupted.

“Uh, Red Robin.â€￾

“Okay, go on.â€￾

“Then, we went back to her place.â€￾

“For what?â€￾

“Because I was supposed to take her home,â€￾ I replied, matter of factly.

“Uh huh.â€￾

“And then we got bored and headed to the beach.â€￾

“What beach?â€￾

“Newport.â€￾ Damn, would he let me finish?

“And what did you do there?â€￾

Ooohhh sh**. “We talked. Laughed. Listened to music. Had sex. Talked some more. Went home.â€￾

I watched the muscles in his fingers tighten and I just waited for him to crack a knuckle or two. His jaw clenched, he said, “What?â€￾

“Come on, man.â€￾

“No, before I f*** you up, I want to make sure you said what I think you said.â€￾

I backed away from him, unable to run, but unwilling to turn and become more vulnerable. “You want the truth, right? I’m trying to be a man about this.â€￾

“A man doesn’t take what doesn’t belong to him.â€￾

“A man knows that a woman isn’t a damn possession.â€￾

“A man also knows that his pride is the most precious thing in his possession.â€￾

“A man knows that his pride is his destruction.â€￾

“A man would never let another man see him with his a guard down.â€￾

I blinked and moved back to my original spot, about five inches from Tony’s face. “A man is willing to let his guard down and stand naked in his truths. I can’t take back what happened last night, and I wouldn’t, even if I could. I’ve loved Michelle from the second I saw her and just because you come along doesn’t mean that sh**’s gonna change. Hate me for it if you want. Hit me for it if you must. But it won’t change a damn thing.â€￾

The last thing I saw was the clench of his jaw when I felt his fist sail across my face and make contact with the top of my cheek and the bottom of my eye.

He grabbed his jacket off of the swivel char adjacent to us, and smirked. “I can’t take back what happened just now, and I wouldn’t, even if I could. Hate me for it if you want, but it won’t change a goddamn thing. Man.â€￾</span></span></span>

:unsure: Feedback?</span>

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Postby Angelpopstar7 » Sun Aug 29, 2004 12:44 pm

HOLY CRAP :jawdrop: Did I just read that correctly! Sh*ts gonna hit the fan now....I hope that Tony doesn't go after Michelle now :unsure: at least justin was a man about it and told Tony the truth...most people would just lie....but why does Tony think that he own Michelle...that disturbs me....MORE PLEASE!

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Postby PreCiouSbAbY » Sun Aug 29, 2004 12:57 pm


You gotta update, I need to know whats going to happen!

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Postby shortie17 » Mon Aug 30, 2004 9:11 pm

I have a lot of catching up to do, but I'm working on it, hopefully by this weekend :)

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